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Posts Tagged ‘trauma’

          We are honored to have the amazing Nancy Brown Joining us to talk about her passion, her life, her mission. Full Moon Farm is an organization dedicated to the well being of the wolfdog (wolf hybrid). Situated on 17 beautiful mountain acres in Black Mountain, NC, we operate as a federally recognized 501(c)(3) not-for-profit organization for abused and refused wolfdogs who find themselves in need of love, shelter, and care through no fault of their own.

         Full Moon Farm provides a safe haven for animals that cannot be placed into homes for the rest of their lives. Their rescued wolfdogs come from animal control agencies, closed breeding situations and occasionally, an owner in crisis. They evaluate each animal upon intake and work with them at their level of comfort. Some animals are “hands off” and they respect their choice, as well as that of the animals that crave human interaction. Their goal is to enrich the lives of the residents, allowing them to reach their highest potential. Support by donation or sponsorship makes that task possible. Though they may be abused or neglected, homeless because of death or divorce, they are all God’s Creatures and worthy of a lifetime of respect. Don’t miss this amazing woman and the beautiful and awsome animals that she dedicates herself to rescue hear her inspiring story this Tuesday on http://www. BlogTalkRadio.com/Illuminationsoflight at 8pmPST, 9PMST
         Nancy recently appeared on the Lifetime Channel, On the Road with Austin and Santino – http://www.mylifetime.com/shows/on-the-road-with-austin-santino/video/full-episodes/season-1/episode-13-pawty-time. Also, wolfdogs were featured in an article on Zootoo – http://www.zootoo.com/zootootv/v/petpulse640wolfdogmyths2  Full Moon Farm is on Facebook – Please support the Cause – Full Moon Farm. We need you.  http://apps.facebook.com/causes/279502  Join our Group:  http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=25616163419  Full Moon Farm is on Youtube as well, but the video request must be entered as Full Moon Farm + wolf dogs, as there is another Full Moon Farm and it deals with horses.
        DON’T MISS THIS AMAZING WOMAN  and the beautiful and noble  animals that she dedicates herself to rescue. Hear her inspiring story this Tuesday November 23, 2010 on Illuminations Of Light Live! at 8 PM PST, 9PM MST on www.BlogTalkRadio.Com/Illuminationsoflight

 

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Greetings and Salutations One and All! It has been an amazing time of change and rebirth. Many people’s lives have changed, and in the immediate it looks bleak but there is a rainbow after every storm.  How we choose to see the challenges and they are many, is how we will weather that storm and the aftermath from it. It is for sure one of the most difficult challenges in life when your entire world changes in a matter of moments, or hours.  The good news is that just as quickly as it seems to all fall apart there is a solution to the issue at hand or a new door that opens, a new road, a new beginning. It is never easy changes in life, especially when they seem to come to your face back to back to back, but hold steady and take things one moment at a time when it seems that you cannot breath for all the blows you have been given.  Talk it out as much as you can with good friends who do not mind listening. Go ride your bike or get quiet with God in your own personal way and get it out of your system. Allow the emotions to ride through you like walking through a fog. Let them go and realize and accept that what you are dealing with is not a mountain, it only feels like it. See it as a speed bump, knowing that you are on the right track, because the law of opposites always comes first. Do not give up on yourself. Do not give up on God and the Universe. Do your best to say thank you for those things you do have, not focus on what is lacking or now lost. It is in the gratitude that prayers and miracles can work along with a little faith and some action that you do have control of.

I will share with all of you that this past two weeks has been a true test of endurance in faith walking. As many things as one could imagine possibly going wrong did and then some. But all the while I kept telling myself that it would all work out. I had several moments of total breakdown to release the shockwaves that had hit my heart, mind, body and soul. But as I have advised to all of you, I allowed myself to feel those feelings as a part of the response to the stimuli but once that was done, I started to focus on those things I did have in my life that were not broken or gone, those things which survived and needed to be nurtured and valued. I took action on those things which were within my control and asked for help from others un ashamed because it was truly needed in the moment and so grateful that it was there when I did ask. For all the things that went wrong, it could have been so much worse! And as the challenges presented themselves there was someone there to pick up the baton and run with it until the goal of moving me was completed. Now the job of getting me settled and working is at hand. No longer a desire but a need. I had set out on this path to begin anew, to expand myself and my horizons. I made it through when the odds were totally against me making that happen. Moments of doubt in myself in everything and everybody, but they were moments not days or months. The ebb and flow moved quickly and things continue to move with a swiftness I have not experienced since my awakening. I am not perfect, I have my moments of weakness and anger and frustration like all the rest, but I do my best now, to really seize that opportunity to change my perspective and actions around when challenges arise. I stay in the right now. What can I do about this right now? If it’s nothing then fretting will not help at all. So I may retreat and meditate, or write, or sing or walk or sit in the sun, something to change how I am looking at things. Taking a moment to come to a balance. That is not an easy thing to do when you just want to run and hide from the world wondering why you woke up this morning. Not an easy thing to do when you feel like the train has just plowed into your chest and you cannot breath over and over again.

Change always means the death of something and the rebirth of a new thing. It is never the same but if it was, we would not grow, it would be boring and stagnant if there were no adversity in the world. This is why we are grateful for even the challenges in life. Yes life changing. Yes very scary because we do not know what lies before us. We have to remember that it could be something even more wonderful then we ever imagined! It may look the same but it could be better and stronger! YOU are better and stronger having walked through that fire! Now you might be able to help guide another though that same scary moment when they come to it in their walk! You never know until you try it. You never know unless you risk walking through that door of uncertainty and discomfort. Living life requires that you take the risks. Failure is only one step closer to success. We never learn if we don’t try. For me, I worked on the show, the websites, unpacking boxes and organizing one box at a time, I had to rearrange a few things and borrow a friend’s car for awhile, I have to figure out a means of income that will sustain my son and I. When I stepped back and took things as I could, what I could do I did, what I couldn’t do I put off until I could do it with success and clarity. I am being very contemplative in the steps that I make and not doing it from a place of fear or desperation. I have done my best, not totally successful at not reacting but responding. I have remembered to be loving with myself and others and to be grateful for all that I have. To remember that no matter how dark it seems, God has never let me down. Even when things didn’t logically make sense, it will always work out for the highest good of all. I try to remember to be humble and compassionate in my walk. To do deeds in love without expectation. To give until I can give no more of myself, my belongings, my time, my knowledge… and if I do these things, then all the rest will fall into place somehow.

Stand up for what is right. Believe in yourself when no one else does. Remember that we are never alone even though the road can be lonely. Life is meant to be lived. We are meant to be happy whatever that looks like to you. I know that God has not brought me through the many things in life that I have endured to have me fail now. I have to believe that he loves me that much and that I have to love myself that much. I am thankful that I have people around me to remind me to believe in my ability to carry on no matter what. To land on my feet and make lemonade out the lemons I get handed. I do my best to find the serenity in any given moment. The beauty of the sunrise, the peace of the sunset. The simple things in life that make me cherish the life I have and give me the strength to make it through to the next challenge or task at hand and to give me the stamina to endure those moments when life is not fun or happy. I encourage all of you to hear my tales and thoughts and see if you see some of yourself or someone you know in these words and perhaps for a moment see a new perspective a different set of eyes. And that my hope is you find some comfort in knowing that it will all be OK and will work out just as it’s supposed to. Staying in the now, keeps your sanity. Leave for tomorrow what is tomorrows today has enough of its own.

Share with us if you will some of your moments of strength and challenge and how you overcame in your journey. It is good to share so that others may gain from your experience.

I thank you all for your time and consideration of these musings of mine. Be blessed and nothing less always.

Until next time. Adieu. xox Kimberly

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Greetings and Salutations! One and All! I do hope that the week has been good for you so far!

Today I want to talk about the coming of a new day!

For those of us who are awake or partially awake, it has become difficult to navigate the energies and most of us have done beautifully!

It seems that the heaviness of these purges are going to kill us or make us want to kill ourselves.  It is in these moments when all of the tools you have been given throughout your lifetime have to be pulled from the magic bag of tricks.  When the world is falling apart around you for no apparently good reason that we turn to the one thing that can and will help. Our Creator.

I believe that in most cases we bring things to ourselves for our own growth and expansion, but too there have been times when I have been placed in very surreal experiences that had absolutely nothing to do with me but more to do with the people who had been placed in my life. In some instances that meant soul retrieval and soul rescue for those who had been captured in time and space and replaced with some other entity or entities controlling the body. Similar to a possession. Some would say this is time for me to be put into a looney bin and others quietly understand what it is I am talking about.

My life has taken me to the very lowest of lows being in the streets with the bums and the crazy folk, but it was there too that some of my brightest angels on earth were found and helped me navigate that reality so that I could survive. I have been what society would consider a success as well, making money hand over fist but not being responsible with it, not using it to help others. So it was taken away from me almost over night. I was then put in the streets with two children. I have lost it all and rebuilt it over 7 times so far in my life.  I am thankful for the good and the bad, even though in my human moments I have great difficulty in seeing those times as good things. I am still learning to not judge things including my own actions or the actions of others. I am learning to release the need for expectation and entitlement. Similar to the story of JOB in the christian teachings, the Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away, all is always for our highest good and we should be grateful for it all good and bad for if it was not for that Creator we would not exist. I believe that no matter the adversity that we endure in our lifetime, it is forgotten on the other side. What is left is the expanded consciousness and deeper love.

So it comes down to FAITH. Finding Answers In The Heart. For it is there in the heart where our creator, high self, guides, other aspects of ourselves in other realities I think they call them dopplegangers it all begins in that place in the heart that we hear them, feel them, experience or re-experience them. I would not allow the bird to go without food or shelter, why would you think I would want less for you? I know that my needs will be met. I know that the universe and that being I call God, loves me beyond any love any human being could possibly express. I have been with Him. I have felt him within me, my body mind and soul. I will only ever ultimately trust that being that resides in all things. People ask well what religion are you? I tell them I am all and none of them. They look at me like I am crazy. But I remember a time when this planet was still new when there was only ONE and nothing more. We all worked in harmony and loved our creations. Delighted in what we could create and did it with joy and love. The planet that I remember had love as it’s main frequency. Not to say that this planet is different, but certainly the frequencies are.

I have faith, even though I find myself in circumstances which would send the average person into a complete and total depression, even in my sadness I give thanks that the solutions be brought forth with ease and grace, and that it is perfect in all ways for all concerned and the good of all in general. I have FAITH that it will all work out just as it is supposed to for even if it is not what I may want or THINK is the right thing, I KNOW that the universe has got my back no matter what set of circumstances I find myself in. In a weird way there is peace in knowing that I still have to do my part but that the universe is there like a full orchestra to back me up on that stage of life.

Yes when it rains it pours, but bust out your seeds and water barrels and capture the moment and grow something beautiful when a new day dawns! Yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death….he leadeth me to green pastures and cool waters….we all have to walk through that valley several hundred times in our lives. We choose to sit and have a picnic and camp out there, it’s like my son’s vice principal said to my son this morning, “There are two words which both begin with VIC…. do you know what those words are? Victim or Victor, which are you going to be? A victim who does nothing and takes apathy as their route in life and does nothing to move up or forward or you can be the Victor and walk through it and just do it!”  Words of wisdom from a woman who’s job was just cut because of budget cuts. She moved her whole family from Washington to Colorado and they cut her job! Inspirational coming from her. A great woman, mother and administrator, the district has their head on backwards for eliminating her position.

So as children or as adults, we all have those moments when life throws us a curve ball, if you are paying attention you can turn that into a grand slam or you can get hit in the head and wonder what happened.

I do all I can to help the universe make my life the greatest it can be, and people say even with all that you go through you always land on your feet and you always maintain a positive attitude. It is said that when we smile it releases serotonin and gives us a better outlook, so the fake it til you make it does work on a chemical level. I choose to be a VICTOR not a VICTIM to life or circumstance or people. I will walk through this valley and lay down by the cool waters. It is in the lack of acceptance that we suffer. The sooner we accept it the sooner we can stop asking why and ask instead what is the solution, what am I going to do with this? Ask and if you get no answer then trust that it is not time yet, the universe has not lined the perfect scenario up for you, you do your part, look for that job, go to school, be doing what you CAN in the moment, if there is nothing you can do more or do about another’s decision or a company going under, then do what you can …. clear your space, clear your thinking whatever that entails. Sometimes doing NOTHING is the answer. The universe wants you to rest and heal your body or spirit. The wisdom of silence. Saying nothing, walking away is the answer sometimes. No matter how much it hurts. It will be better. It has to, for as bad as things get there is always a rainbow after the storm, there is always a flower that blooms from the muddied grounds.

These are times of great change. We must be able to ride the waves and not let them crush us. Even in stormy waters and it feels like the gasps are fewer and further between. You become a stronger swimmer. Ride the waves as best you can, lean on each other and support one another for it is difficult for all, but we can bring it in with ease and grace by showing that to each other. Remember always what you put out you get back. Break things down to the core issues and not the symptoms. People react out of fear, what is the fear, address it. What can you do about it, what steps can you take to change it or make it different? You can do whatever you want to do, but it takes baby steps in that general direction to get there.

This time is about personality clean up and changing of perspectives, and the cool thing about that is that each new day brings a new opportunity for happiness and joy. Each new day gives us the chance to help another. Each new day we get to learn something new. Each new day we have the chance to laugh and smile.  There is a coming of a new day for you and I. Leave tomorrow for tomorrow. Do not let fear stop you from achieving your happiness. It serves no one and is a waste of the gift of life. Life is all about the Love. Happiness. Joy. Serenity. Peace.

Life is short. It can end or change in a split second. Don’t waste it. Fix it. Make it right. Love is all that matters. The great thing about it is you can do that right NOW, this second. Change your mind. Do something different. Don’t try, just do it. Because you can you know. It’s not that hard once you take the steps. Today is the new day! Right now! Right here! This moment! Make it count, make it memorable, make it great! If everyone is flipping out around you , that is their problem you can still be joyful with you. Pray that they too will come around and come back to you, for miracles never cease. Strange things happen in strange times. Love always finds it’s way back to itself. So do not look at the loss, look what you have, give thanks. Keep the faith, do your best to not panic and go to the other side of the valley. God takes care of us, we are all worthy and deserving of love from Him and each other. Let those who cannot do that go. Until they can stop thinking of themselves and begin to think of others as well. Do YOU! Do what YOU can and leave the rest to God. You will see that if you surrender it, it will work out ok. Promise. But you have to leave it there. Because every time you worry about it or think about it, you are taking it back and have to give it up again. So say thank you for you know its done.

Have a grand weekend everyone! I love you all !!! You make the journey fun!

Love n Light in Oneness of Heart,

Kimberly

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Greetings and Salutations! One and All! Well I will tell you this has been a very dynamic week for me personally with all the energies going wild and bouncing off of everyone and everything! Some awesome new stuff was born out of this chaotic energy but it was very difficult to ride this wave!

One of the things I have been learning to do is to be aware. We touched on this in the last entry on mindfullness and we gave you an exercise to play with over the week. How did that go for you? Did you start to notice any changes within your being?

Dr. Bruce Lipton, talks in his book, ” The Biology of Belief”, about how our ” Perceptions” can absolutely have a profound effect on our physical and emotional well being. How we “see” our world through our filters of experiences can be skewed and absolutely create real physical issues. It’s been said, there is your truth, my truth and THE truth. The fact of the matter is, all of us have these experiential filters that cause us to have the experience of something loving or something fearful. If we are in a state of fear, our physical bodies go into a protection mode and we stop growing, we lower the immune system, and deplete from other systems in the body that we use for growth, because on a very primal level we are telling the body to prepare for fight or flight. When our bodies do this, extra blood etc. is sent to the muscles to get ready to run or fight. When we come from a place of bliss or peace or love, our bodies are relaxed and in the mode of growth. The very interesting thing which I found amazing in the ” Biology of Perception” was the tidbit that all of our habits, and beliefs are stored in the “subconscious” not the “conscious” mind. That these two are like two different people. The “subconscious” is very logically based and likes order and is “timeless” it does not know past or future, only current input in the NOW moment, it does not understand otherwise. The “conscious” mind is the part of us that says, “Hey let’s go check that out and get some new experience!” It is the free flowing creative side that doesn’t mind chaos, and getting stuck in the past or the future creates issues if we address issues from this perspective. This is the problem with self help books. They address the conscious mind not the subconscious. You have to address both to gain true healing and balance.

So what are some ways that we begin to reprogram the subconscious mind to be in harmony with our conscious mind? Well there are many tools out there which can be used to achieve this goal. As with all things intent and commitment are key. You have to have a willingness to achieve this. Now at times the subconscious is not ready to accept that change.

How can you tell if the subconscious is ready or not? The human body is equipt with its own bio feed back equiptment! It’s fantastic! Kinesiology is a wonderful tool to help assess and diagnose an issue that may be blocking healing. This same idea can be used to correct thinking and perception.

With regard to mindfullness, where are you feeling it in your body. Last week we had you note 20 things in a room when you found yourself triggered. This week I want you to be aware of where you are feeling your feelings in your own body. What physical signals are you getting from your own body (natural bio feed back) about how you are feeling.

If you wish, take this a step further, and write it down, so you can see in writing, what time of day, what are the triggers, what is the core emotion that is associated with that, it can be simple like feels good or feels bad. By creating this record you begin to see the patterns of your own responses and how your body is affected. By doing this you can begin to reprogram the thinking patterns which were learned at a young age.

I am going to post some videos which far better explain this process of kinesiology and the ways you can use this modality to shift yourself and your perceptions.

Dee Wallace shared a wonderful exercise she did with her seminars, that she would give everyone a PlayDough ball and tell them to create something. Everyone would. Then she would instruct them to mush it up into a ball and create something else.  Her analogy being, we as humans complicate things, that changing our life and our reality is as easy as mushing up that playdough and starting another creation. Instead, we like to hold that creation, drag it around with us everywhere showing it off to everyone etc not doing anything to change that thinking.

So practice being aware of what you are feeling, and where you are feeling it in your own body. Use your own natural biofeedback to help you identify what the challenge areas are within your own being.

Watch these videos on some tools to use to begin to make real changes in your life, in your “perceptions” and beliefs! Let us know what you think!

Until next time! Blessings from me and mine to you and yours in the heart of Oneness. Namaste~!

This first set of videos are from Bruce Lipton, he explains the biological reasons that positive thinking works and how.

I will only post the first one, there are seven in the series! Watch the entire set!

This second set is part II of the lecture featuring Rob Williams, the creator of PSYCH-K, who gives wonderful tools to remove old programming and replace it with new improved ideas that are more in alignment with where you want to be!

This is the “Psychology of Change” by Rob Williams this is part 1 of 8 and you will want to see all 8!

This is a different take on his method

This is a short one on self testing

This again another version of self testing from the folks at enjoyabetterworld.com

This is Dee Wallace on Creative Consciousness, interview on Braveheart Women

This is part 1 of 3, this book is dynamite! You will want to see all of this interview!

Finally Gary Zukav and Linda Francis talk briefly about Authentic Power!

I do hope you find these videos helpful, I know I certainly have.

Blessings all until we meet again!


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lluminations of Light LIVE! Presents Stanley Victor Paskavich to the show March 30, 2010 9pm MST on blogtalkradio.com/illuminationsoflight

Stanley was raised in Glendridge, Illinois, the fourth son of five to Stanley Paskavich and Dora Mae Marie Paskavich. He graduated in 1977 at Sandoval High School and worked as a janitor there until he joined the USAF in 1979. He got out of the Air Force for medical reasons in 1991, shortly after running a shift in the Dover Deleaware Port Mortuary.

His book Stantasyland is compiled from different times and beliefs in his life. Some of the poems go back 30 years or more. He writes about his life, himself, religion, and spirituality, along with some other political things thrown in for good measure and some interesting perspectives on life. He states in his own words, “often I write per perspective. I don’t intend to convince, confirm, or condemn with my writings, just possibly stimulate some different lines of thought. I respect anyone who is convinced in their belief and convictions, and/or belief systems as long as they do not use it as a weapon against another. Truth, Peace, Tranquility (TPT) Stan”

Stan is an amazing survivor and visionary and has a lot to say about alot of things.  He is difficult to follow for some and amazingly inspirational to others. He is a humble person who has seen more then most in his short time upon Mother Earth. After handling dead bodies for several months, it had a profound affect on his world and his thinking. He is a walk in which is something that most do not know about him. We will be discussing this on the show with him and about some of his views of the cosmos and life in general. It’s simple but complex much like Stan himself.

We are pleased and honored to welcome Stan D’Man to our show! March 30, 2010 9pm MST on blogtalkradio.com/illuminationsoflight! Don’t miss it!

More recent musings from Stan D’Man!
“I was listening to Coast to Coast AM this morning on Paltalk. There was a guest speaking about NDE’s ‘Near Death Experiences’. I’ve had several NDE’s. I’ve never seen the tunnel of lights. I’ve never seen the loved ones welcoming me home. But when I awoke I realized that I was having a NLE a ‘Near Life Experience’. I believe many of us are. So I suggest we might want to try harder to live every moment to it’s fullest. Because like they say. “It’s not a dress rehearsal.”
You have seen his poetry featured on my pages and now is being considered for a poster for the NRA and of course Stantasyland.!
Stan is one of the most interesting people I know and his views on walk-ins and war and life will definitely make you think! So be sure to tune in this Tuesday Night 9pm MST and 10pm CST for Illuminations of Light LIVE! For more information on Stanley V. Paskavich please click here. To purchase his book click here. To visit Stan’s Stantasyland homepage click here.


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Greetings and Salutations One and All! Today I would like to discuss the importance of positive thinking.  I would like to begin with positive thinking doesn’t mean a 24 hour a day thing, that would make you extreme and robotic and not human at all. The truth of it is, we are humanoids that experience emotions and encounters which trigger emotional responses so that we are given the opportunities to grow individually and as a group.  All things are energy. Nothing more or less. These energies are based in frequencies and when plucked can cause quite a reverberation for all universes to hear. This being said, energy of thought is like plucking that string or set of strings to make a harmonic sound or a chord if you will. Thus is the song of manifestation in the three D world.  When you send out a thought it goes out to the universe good or bad and it will respond to give you what you ask for. This ability is coming much faster then ever before. Understand that it is the thinking part which plucks the cord so it’s important that you cancel out negative thoughts as quickly as they come to your mind. Let them pass through and change them in golden light or purple light and give them to the heavens for transmutation.  Another lady recently said that she sees all her negative thoughts as she is standing next to a river as leaves fallen from the trees to the river of life and sees them floating down stream and transmuting in the water. That is another great visual. The concept here is to release the negative stinkin thinin from your being. When we send enough of these microcosmic negative thoughts into the collective consciousness we are creating energy to feed not such pleasant results. Of course we can diffuse it with the thinking of waves calming in the ocean to a gentle lap against the shores but it’s easier to just be aware of the fact that we feed those larger snowballs of negativity when we do not cancel it out.

Positive thinking in a world full of negative influences and banter is not an easy thing to do. We are programmed from a very young age to think negative thoughts about ourselves and the world around us. Children are not born with things like fear and anger, those things come as they learn from their own environments and the things we stimulate them with. So we have to basically re-think that far back our own thought patterns. Recognizing our own defense patterns and mechanisms. Recognizing when we are living our story and not our present. Recognizing when we are blaming instead of owning our own stuff. Being able to rise above all of that and come to a place of grace and forgiveness is a whole other story! But it is when we are able to come to these states of grace that we are no longer in conflict with the inner shadows of our human nature and programming. We are coming from a place of being and allowing that does not have conflict only peace and harmony and love.

It takes conscious effort to achieve this control over a very active mind and ego. These things are there for a purpose and they do serve us, however, they do not control us, we control it. The same is true of the emotional body. Positive thinking is a huge part of healing and beginning to come to a place of self love and centeredness.

I could go into all types of reasons on a physical body level why positive thinking is important, however in a nutshell our thoughts, music, words we hear or use, effect our DNA and genetic stuff as well as our overall well being. A recent interview I heard with Dee Wallace she puts an interesting spin on stuff, she said that when we experience trauma, that our feminine and masculine energies become imbalanced and freeze in a state of fear and we get stuck in that fear, her suggestion was to with love and gentleness and talk with your inner child let them know that you are in charge now and that you will keep them safe to follow you in expanding yourself to your greatest potential in a positive light and that you will keep that inner child safe. This is the ultimate trust and safety we can achieve, to trust ourselves. To move through and release and reprogram that we do not love ourselves or others. Forgiveness and grace around these situations. Remember that how things appear on the surface to wait and look beneath. There is lots of ILLUSION n delusion running amuck. Tricks upon the eyes and minds eyes so be aware and discern in love and joy whenever possible, see the best within all beings and things. Even the crystals are being affected so it is important that we keep a positive thought whenever possible, to dive into the negative lower vibrational only perpetuates it. So if you are feeling panicky or in a place of fear then think of a place of serenity. You can go to your happy place simply by taking a few deep breaths and thinking differently. Put a happy song in your ears, your mind, your heart and soul. Smile and think of happy things even when you are sad. Realize pain lies in dreams and the past, neither are the now. Know that you are loved and supported by many angels, guides and beings now and always. We control our thoughts and emotions, what do you choose. Release the expectations that people will do as they say see past where they are coming from fear and see the light within them as they too are growing and expanding in their awareness and consciousness, allow them to be and recognize it is theirs and you do not have to own it or pick it up and look at it unless you so CHOOSE. Smiles. I choose to be love. I choose to be joy. I choose to be expansion always in the light. I choose to see things in a different way and be ok that I am the way I am now in this moment.

Make it a great day everyone! Whenever you read this! There is no time like the present! LOL.

xox Kimberly

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Greetings and Salutations! One and all! It really is amazing how when you begin to really live in the flow of the universe how things just become very synchronistic. Now this does not always mean that all outcomes will be as you want them as you envisioned them. Sometimes things come in ways that we least expect them.

For me, when we have to go through a radical acceptance of something which is outside of our control it is difficult at times to get back up on the horse. I have endured many blows or waves of change within the past two weeks. Almost all my messages from the universe have been related to how to move through the waves of sadness and to stay in the moment and find the happiness within. It has been a lot of hard work on my part to do this. We so easily drift into the past or the future, but to stay exactly in the moment is difficult. This situation involved the deepest kind of pain, losing true love. Problem is only one of us felt that way apparently. So what do you do as your life shatters before you and everything you hold dear is ripped from your world?

Well, one of the techniques I have been trying out is to stop and become aware of my surroundings. Most emotions are triggered from a memory or a thought which is not actually in this moment. So by looking and really consciously noting what is around you can pull you outside of yourself long enough to move through the wave of emotion. Another thing I have been doing is trying to find laughter within my day. Watch a funny movie, read a funny joke, in my case come up with hysterical commercials. The more I stay focused on what my life is about and what I have going on in my world, the less I am thinking about him and what he is doing or thinking, is he hurting like me or has he turned off all emotion and will endure the pain later when it bubbles to the surface? I do not want to waste my day or my time thinking about that stuff, I have a child who is in crisis right now, and I have to move. A move that is not going to be just a down the street deal but pretty far away, looking to sell my belongings type of move. Some say that if you are running then you will still have to deal with it. Yes this is true, however, I have other factors to consider, money being one of them. My health being another of them. I have built up somewhat of a support system where I am however the rents in my area have skyrocketed and I can no longer afford where I am staying. A simple fact of life, the cost of living has increased and my income has decreased. So we are off to the next exciting leg of our adventure. The bottom line to all that is, I really do not have time to pine and drool over what has been lost or what I do not have in my life.

The fact of the matter is, I didn’t need him before I met him, I certainly do not need him now. Needs and desires are two different things. Just as love and partners are. Relationships require a certain amount of energy and effort and right now, I just do not have it to give anymore and apparently neither does he. I have my own health issues. He has his. I am trying to get my business resurrected from before a brain injury four years ago. That in and of itself is enough to keep my focus occupied. This person has his own issues. I still love him, that will never change, but I require my relationships to go both ways, he’s not able to achieve this at this time. I can wait yes, but really what for?? A man who cannot commit? Who cannot make up his mind that after three years he wants to be with me or not? I’m sorry I do not want to have to be someones shelter, counselor, mother figure or tell them how to be civil and polite and honest and loving, not my job to train a 45 year old how to be a real person. They will have to learn their way how.  I have a world to conquer people to help out there and there are six billion people on this planet, I will find someone who can deal with me, love me, work with me, encourage me and be respectful and kind to me always. I should not have to work 70% of the relationship and get 30% in return.That’s not a partnership that’s an imbalanced situation that had to give and who knows if it will change if this persons life changes in the future. I know they still love me, they just cannot handle me right now. Or themselves either for that matter. No ones fault, the fault doesn’t exist. Just is what is right now. Not time. So we both accept that. I’m sure that we will always love one another as we loved each other before we came into this life. I do hope someday he catches up with me. I pray that he does make the changes in his world someday for his sake. For his family’s sake.

The universe has been speaking loudly to change my thinking for everyone to change our thinking to NOW. Being in this moment of the present. The joy is there! Right there! Right now! Within you! Sadness lies in the past. In the memory. In the story of what the other person did to you! They did nothing except be themselves, how they are right now. Pick up the pieces. One at a time. Be aware of feeling the feelings but allow them to pass through like a breeze brushes past you standing outside. Love yourself and forgive yourself. For you are worthy. There is no fault. Only what is. Acceptance is where the struggle and the pain lie. The sooner that you come to a place of acceptance the sooner the suffering part stops. Doesn’t mean you have to like what is being handed to you, but it does mean that you have to deal with it and accept that it is how it is. That is where the stopping in the moment works, pulling your thinking out of the memories of the past or the  what could be if’s…..and get into what is actually around you. Look at things and study them, you will see that the moment or wave of emotion passes much more quickly and you can get into your right mind quick enough to pull out of it.

I do not have all the answers here, just that these are some of the techniques I use in my own world. In the day to day things that seem to happen whether or not I instigated them or not, some of it had to change in my world, it was no longer serving my desires or my needs, so it is with life, all about the change, and surfing those waves instead of being crushed by them. Not staying in the moments of sadness or emotional turmoil. If you want something to change, then change it and do your best to move forward in life.

It’s always sad to say goodbye, but in the native world you only say those words when someone passes onto the great spirit. They say farewell because we never know when our paths will cross again. So for now, this is where my head is, I will not have internet access for the next two days and this post will be the last for the moment. I will be writing still as I have nothing else to do but work on the various projects that I have going. So there will probably be several posts at once when i get access to the net again in a couple of days.

As it is I am in the coffee shop getting this posting out as we type. Life is funny. Full of synchronicities watch for them, they will point you to where your thinking should be.  Be well until next time! Love n Light and Blessings to you all. Kimberly

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Greetings and Salutations! One and All! Please be sure to join us tonight for Mary Lou Acimovic who has written a book called Mild Traumatic Brain Injury: The Guidebook, and will be discussing the topic of brain injuries and how they affect our lives. Over 1 million people are affected by this condition each year. Tune in Tuesday 9pm MST blogtalkradio.com/illuminationsoflight !!!

Mary Lou Acimovic has been a practicing speech pathologist for 32 years.  She obtained a Masters Degree in Speech Pathology and Audiology from the University of Colorado.  She is certified in biofeedback (Senior Fellow status) and neurofeedback by the Biofeedback Society of America.  For the past 24 years, she has specialized in the evaluation and treatment of mild traumatic brain injury  She served as the director of the Brain Injury Program at the Mapleton Center for Rehabilitation in Boulder, Colorado and participated in the development of one of the first comprehensive programs in the nation specifically for the treatment of mild traumatic brain injury.  Currently she is in private practice in Boulder.

Ms. Acimovic serves on the Governor’s Brain Injury Advisory Board and advocates for patients’ rights.  She has presented regionally and nationally and has published articles on topics related to mild traumatic brain injury.

Mary Lou is truly a lady who knows her stuff, and you will be shocked and enlightened when this show is done! There are so many people who are afflicted with the conditions we are going to discuss, especially our service men and women! You owe it to yourself to find out more about this condition and who it affects and how, what can be done about it, and how can we be supportive of those who are suffering from it! Be sure to tune this is a show you will NOT want to miss!

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We have recorded most of this blog to audio, we did not include all the videos on the recording but a few snippets to get the idea of what was shared. Thanks! Now onto the blog!

Greetings and salutations! I do hope the day is a beautiful one for you!  We have been working very hard on adding new features to the blog as well as the sites for Illuminations of Light. Preparing for our guests up and coming on the radio show.  I am pleased to announce that we will be having Ronna Herman as our first guest, we also have Michael Jaco, ex USNavy SEAL who has written a magnificent book called “The Intuitive Warrior” which I have to tell you guys is a fantastic book for everyone especially the young men in your life! My fifteen year old couldn’t put it down! That show will air 3/9/10-9pm mst. Then of course the Sedona Lights crew joins us 2/23/10! So lots of great guests, we are so blessed and honored to have them joining us! Be sure to tune in for the show!

Ok so enough of the radio stuff and onto today’s subject.  This is a difficult topic to discuss for most people because trust like love can be an illusive emotion. Not sure how to describe it. Why do we require it? What does it mean to you? How do we trust when no one has ever given us something to trust about? These are questions I hear a lot from clients and myself in my own evaluation of what trust is.

Well I cannot say that I am an expert, but I can share with you what the experts say… and give you my opinions about this topic based on what my feelings are.

This is a fairly good article on the topic of rebuilding trust after betrayal

I have had some difficulty in writing this particular entry of the blogs, because on a personal level, the breech of trust has been a prevalent message for me on a personal level.  In the course of this year, I have experienced in people that are close to me, turning on me and betraying me on many levels. So in the course of doing research, a lot of my own stuff came up.  When I evaluated it, did my list, I recognized that I was continuing to have the expectation that people would do what they said, behave a certain way, keep their promises, honor my belongings in my home and vehicle, to honor my wishes, my physical body, to do a job well done for monies earned, be my friend and not my enemy. That is a lot of expectations to have out there in the thinking processes. Then came the word FAITH. To have faith that everything will be handled and fixed. If I believe it will. But you know in the throws of my panic, and I definitely was panicked! I found it very difficult to focus on anything else except how in the world was I going to do all I needed to do and make things come together. This led to looking at my need to control. I had to tell myself, I had no control over any of the things which were taking place around me. And mad about it! Then I had to come to a place of acceptance with that idea, not easily, my inner child was fighting this big time! So once I evaluated what I did and did not have control over, I was able to breath again.  I was able to put things out of the emotional state back into a spiritual state with some deep breathing, talking to a friend, food, crying to release the built up frustrations, rest and then processing.  In the end, it was a computer error, all was fine and I was not as bad off as I originally thought. But I will tell you the drama that set off in my mind was pretty amazing even to me! I was going there! After so much loss this past several years, after all the fighting I did last month to make the radio show and such come together financially, the friends I have had to say goodbye to for good, trust and trusting the universe was not in my mindset. I had to consciously pull it back to get to that point of balance again.

So what is trust?

Trust is a comfort zone within our being that allows us to fully relax and be ourselves. To know that our confidences will be kept and our beings honored and respected. By my definition anyways.

On a metaphysical level however, it is holding onto expectations. If we are having expectations and or judgment about a thing then we are not coming from a place of unconditional love. Because unconditional love has no room for either by definition. Things just ARE. People are where they are in their path and lessons, and sometimes they can act out of character due to outside circumstances, or imbalances which are not within our ability to control. Circumstances can look one way and turn out a totally different way then we thought. If we allow our past experiences to rule our reactions, we are not coming from that place of peace or love.

Forgiveness:

When we agree to forgive a broken trust or betrayal it doesn’t mean that we forget. But it is in the not forgetting that we remember our lessons with regard to that incident.  It’s in the remembering that we recognize certain signs right? Many people would agree with that statement, but the reality is if we are staying truly in the moment, in the right now, then we are not experiencing the exact same thing in the exact same way, we are in a different place because we are different and have hopefully grown from that past experience. If we have not let go then there will be reactions, expectations and lots of self sabotage.  Of course I am not referring to life threatening circumstances, I would not recommend that you stay with a person who continues to be abusive, but you can in the recovery come to a place of tolerance and forgiveness of that person.  If we know a person is a chronic liar, white lies, half truths, omissions of facts to the whole story, or just bold face lies to our face. The person is more then likely coming from a place of fear that they would feel the need to lie.  So try to see things from their eyes. Why are they doing what it is they are doing? Are they ill? Are they afraid? Are they within their rational thinking zone? If not then know that they will have to deal with the consequences of their own actions. They will be repaid by the law of cause and effect. Look at them with pity not anger and loathing and disgust, with compassion for the pain they must be under. This is coming from the place of uncondtional love. Remember, ” Let he who has not sinned cast the first stone.” None of us are perfect. We all make mistakes. Sometimes those mistakes are repeated because the person does not see themselves as doing that, i.e. compulsive liars, sociopaths, co dependents, addicts, or just people who are in denial or believe their own lies they have been telling them so long. In the instance of adultery, this is something that can definitely be worked around and through if you love your partner enough to put the effort and the work involved to make it work.  Often times cheating is a symptom of much deeper rooted issues within a persona or a relationship. It’s the core reasons WHY someone looks outside of a relationship which are the real culprits of the break down. Communications are essential, being honest with one’s self and then their partner is also essential.

Honesty. To be able to at the very least, be honest with yourself. When you are cheating and lying to your family, you are a liar. That’s not calling names, it’s stating a fact. You are lying to yourself to think otherwise.  If you are not following through with your word, you are lying. If you are not keeping promises or going back on them, you are lying.  If you are flaking on appointments and making excuses that’s still a form of lying and if you are telling a half truth, or half information, that too is a lie.

Webster’s defines these terms as such:

Lie-

intransitive verb 1 : to make an untrue statement with intent to deceive
2 : to create a false or misleading impression

transitive verb : to bring about by telling lies <lied his way out of trouble>

synonyms lie, prevaricate, equivocate, palter, fib mean to tell an untruth. lie is the blunt term, imputing dishonesty <lied about where he had been>. prevaricate softens the bluntness of lie by implying quibbling or confusing the issue <during the hearings the witness did his best to prevaricate>. equivocate implies using words having more than one sense so as to seem to say one thing but intend another <equivocated endlessly in an attempt to mislead her inquisitors>. palter implies making unreliable statements of fact or intention or insincere promises <a swindler paltering with his investors>. fib applies to a telling of a trivial untruth <fibbed about the price of the new suit>.
Liar-
Main Entry: li·ar
Pronunciation: \ˈlī(-ə)r\
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Old English lēogere, from lēogan to lie — more at lie
Date: before 12th century

: a person who tells lies

Honesty-

Main Entry: hon·es·ty
Pronunciation: \ˈä-nəs-tē\
Function: noun
Inflected Form(s): plural hon·es·ties
Date: 14th century

1 obsolete : chastity
2 a : fairness and straightforwardness of conduct b : adherence to the facts : sincerity
3 : any of a genus (Lunaria) of European herbs of the mustard family with toothed leaves and flat disk-shaped siliques

synonyms honesty, honor, integrity, probity mean uprightness of character or action. honesty implies a refusal to lie, steal, or deceive in any way. honor suggests an active or anxious regard for the standards of one’s profession, calling, or position. integrity implies trustworthiness and incorruptibility to a degree that one is incapable of being false to a trust, responsibility, or pledge. probity implies tried and proven honesty or integrity.
Trust:
Main Entry: 1trust
Pronunciation: \ˈtrəst\
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, probably of Scandinavian origin; akin to Old Norse traust trust; akin to Old English trēowe faithful — more at true
Date: 13th century

1 a : assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something b : one in which confidence is placed
2 a : dependence on something future or contingent : hope b : reliance on future payment for property (as merchandise) delivered : credit <bought furniture on trust>
3 a : a property interest held by one person for the benefit of another b : a combination of firms or corporations formed by a legal agreement; especially : one that reduces or threatens to reduce competition
4 archaic : trustworthiness
5 a (1) : a charge or duty imposed in faith or confidence or as a condition of some relationship (2) : something committed or entrusted to one to be used or cared for in the interest of another b : responsible charge or office c : care, custody <the child committed to her trust>

in trust : in the care or possession of a trustee

Betray-

Main Entry: be·tray
Pronunciation: \bi-ˈtrā, bē-\
Function: verb
Etymology: Middle English, from be- + trayen to betray, from Anglo-French trahir, from Latin tradere — more at traitor
Date: 13th century

transitive verb 1 : to lead astray; especially : seduce
2 : to deliver to an enemy by treachery
3 : to fail or desert especially in time of need <betrayed his family>
4 a : to reveal unintentionally <betray one’s true feelings> b : show, indicate c : to disclose in violation of confidence <betray a secret>intransitive verb : to prove false

synonyms see reveal

be·tray·al \-ˈtrā(-ə)l\ noun

be·tray·er \-ˈtrā-ər\ noun

FORGIVE:

Main Entry: for·give
Pronunciation: \fər-ˈgiv, fȯr-\
Function: verb
Inflected Form(s): for·gave \-ˈgāv\; for·giv·en \-ˈgi-vən\; for·giv·ing
Etymology: Middle English, from Old English forgifan, from for- + gifan to give
Date: before 12th century

transitive verb 1 a : to give up resentment of or claim to requital for <forgive an insult> b : to grant relief from payment of <forgive a debt>
2 : to cease to feel resentment against (an offender) : pardon <forgive one’s enemies>intransitive verb : to grant forgiveness

EXPECTATION:

Main Entry: ex·pec·ta·tion
Pronunciation: \ˌek-ˌspek-ˈtā-shən, ik-\
Function: noun
Date: 1540

1 : the act or state of expecting : anticipation <in expectation of what would happen>
2 a : something expected <not up to expectations> <expectations for an economic recovery> b : basis for expecting : assurance <they have every expectation of success> c : prospects of inheritance —usually used in plural
3 : the state of being expected
4 a : expectancy 2b b : expected value

ex·pec·ta·tion·al \-ˈtā-shə-nəl, -shnəl\ adjective

JUDGMENT:

Main Entry: judg·ment
Variant(s): or judge·ment \ˈjəj-mənt\
Function: noun
Date: 13th century

1 a : a formal utterance of an authoritative opinion b : an opinion so pronounced
2 a : a formal decision given by a court b (1) : an obligation (as a debt) created by the decree of a court (2) : a certificate evidencing such a decree
3 a capitalized : the final judging of humankind by God b : a divine sentence or decision; specifically : a calamity held to be sent by God
4 a : the process of forming an opinion or evaluation by discerning and comparing b : an opinion or estimate so formed
5 a : the capacity for judging : discernment b : the exercise of this capacity
6 : a proposition stating something believed or asserted

synonyms see sense
BALANCE-
9 : mental and emotional steadiness
UNCONDITIONAL LOVE:
to love unconditionally, no expectation, no judgment or opinion, to allow people and things to just BE as they are right now.
If we are communicating well and effectively, if we are coming from a place of forgiveness and unconditional love, if we are allowing the other person to be themselves in a non controlling fashion, if we are being courteous and kind and understanding and compassionate to those around us, trust comes naturally. When we lack trust, we are coming from a place of lack, of fear, of non belief and non faith. This does nothing for the other party or the situation, only serves to make us upset and angry. We have to release the expectations that people behave a certain way or we are trying to exert control over something we have no control over. Thus our feelings of betrayal. We are truly responsible for how WE feel. No one else. Trust in yourself. Trust in the universe that all things are perfect at all times. Trust in the ebbs and flows of life. Give thanks even in the moments of greatest frustration and despair.
FAITH- Find Answers In The Heart!  If you are truly a spiritual person, then KNOW that things will work out for your highest good and the good of all concerned. KNOW that you are not alone EVER! When we say a prayer, say it like this…”Thank you for <insert the thing you are asking for>” and KNOW that it’s been heard and will be answered one way or the other. Then LEAVE IT THERE! If you begin to worry, or fret or discuss it you take it back from the universe! Let go and let god! Means leave it there, and know in your heart that it will be handled! If you can do this, if you consciously make that choice in the middle of the worry, you will see that things clear up much more quickly, answers are revealed, solutions brought to the light, opportunities open up again. We are truly our own worst enemies. We muck things up all the time. People are human. Humans learn from experiences good and bad. Sometimes, it takes a lifetime of experience to get it, sometimes several, but it is neither right or wrong. For there is no right or wrong. There is what works and what doesn’t work for us. Cause and effect. But there is no right and wrong. Just what is.
So if you are struggling with the issues of trust. Whether to trust or not. How to feel that peace and flow where trust and safety just are there. Begin with YOU. Look at those things which you do not really wish to admit to yourself. Healer, heal thyself. Begin with being honest with yourself brutally honest. See if this doesn’t change your attitude and your life just a little bit. It is something which is earned, how we treat each other makes a big difference. Consistency and repeated behaviors instill security and that safety feeling. Keeping confidences. Keeping your word. Things that we all would like to have. So put that out. Be an honest person to the best of your ability. Be a forgiving and caring person, you would want that if the shoe were on the other foot. Do not be extreme, use good common sense. If someone is hurting you, do what you can to stop them from doing it again. Do not put yourself into circumstances which will encourage the behavior. If someone steals from you, do not leave valuable things alone with them. If someone constantly lies to you, take it with a grain of salt and verify it. Do not accuse just because they have done it before, doesn’t always mean they will do it again, so ASK for clarification when words and actions do not line up. If they still lie then walk away, do not engage. Feel sorry for them and walk away knowing you know what the truth is. For they may see their version of the truth and they are entitled to it even if you disagree. If someone has left you for another, then they are not meant to be with you, it’s their choice too. If they have been unfaithful and broken an agreement, look at the reasons why and assess the core issues. It may or may not work out, you may find the other issues are not ones that can be worked out, then again you may find they can be and it will bring you together even stronger then before. No the love and the feelings can never be the same, but we can choose which way they go. We choose, we decide. We also when dealing with others have to honor their freedom of choice too. That’s a tough one to swallow for most. Why we love them and they will not love us back. What did we do ?? Sometimes, most times, it’s not about YOU. It’s about them and their own issues or insecurities or fears. Sometimes its just time to move on, people are in our lives a day, a season or a lifetime. Not all things are meant to last forever, just for their time. Acceptance is difficult. WE want to control outcomes, we want to control other’s behaviors. Reality, looking at things as they are , not as they could be or should be or were.  I’m sure there are many out there who would disagree with this assessment of trust and the solutions it provides and that’s fine. These are my perspectives, how I get through, how I can forgive even the most dreadful behaviors. Perhaps some of this will  help you or someone you know when you are faced with betrayal of any kind. The disappointment which stems from expectations not met. That’s on us. Not the other person. They have to live with their actions and words and choices. Just as we all do. But we can overcome the lack of trust in others and ourselves. It takes work and real honesty within ourselves.
I think that’s enough for today. Blessed be, one and ALL.
with love n light in my heart,
Kimberly
Here’s some other experts and what they have to say on this topic.

Patty German-Individual Therapy: Learning to Trust Again

Burt Harding on Trust
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Burt Harding on What to do when caught in emotional suffering….What’s Next?
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Burt Harding on Loving Acceptance Brings Total Change…
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Learning to trust again …. Why should we?
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Part II of Learning to Trust Again….
There are 15 entries to this last video series, you can access them on the right side of youtubes other videos.
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Learning to trust others the right way….
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Be an encourager
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How to get your partner to trust you again….

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Greetings and salutations! One and All! Hard to believe this month is ending already. We here at Illuminations of Light have been very busy working on the technical ends of the show for February 16th!  This is why I have been quiet on the blog. We did do the show on OUR WORLDS and the main web site http://www.illuminationsoflight.com has the replay of the show available. We had a great time doing the show and we learned a lot! So I am getting excited as we have more guests contacting us and agreeing to do the shows. This whole journey has been quite a ride and I am loving each and every moment of it! I am so grateful and humbled for all the support from friends and loved ones thank you so much for all your help in the backround helping to make the show great! SZ and Mtn-Hawk and Miss xpression of light, they all have worked hard preparing for this great day!

I was pretty happy to be able to say hello to my granddaughter! What a joy she is! I tell you that girl is special! But then again so is her momma! They grow up so quickly! It truly is amazing.

So today I wanted to talk about STRESS.  A condition which affects almost every person on this planet just about. Stress is the number one generator of dis-ease within the body and affects every aspect of our lives when we are not able to get it under control.

According to Medicine Net.com, “What is stress?

Stress is simply a fact of nature — forces from the outside world affecting the individual. The individual responds to stress in ways that affect the individual as well as their environment. Hence, all living creatures are in a constant interchange with their surroundings (the ecosystem), both physically and behaviorally. This interplay of forces, or energy, is of course present in the relationships between all matter in the universe, whether it is living (animate) or not living (inanimate). However, there are critical differences in how different living creatures relate to their environment. These differences have far-reaching consequences for survival. Because of the overabundance of stress in our modern lives, we usually think of stress as a negative experience, but from a biological point of view, stress can be a neutral, negative, or positive experience.

In general, stress is related to both external and internal factors. External factors include the physical environment, including your job, your relationships with others, your home, and all the situations, challenges, difficulties, and expectations you’re confronted with on a daily basis. Internal factors determine your body’s ability to respond to, and deal with, the external stress-inducing factors. Internal factors which influence your ability to handle stress include your nutritional status, overall health and fitness levels, emotional well-being, and the amount of sleep and rest you get.”

They go onto say…..

What are the signs and symptoms of poorly managed stress?

Excess stress can manifest itself in a variety of emotional, behavioral, and even physical symptoms, and the symptoms of stress vary enormously among different individuals. Common somatic (physical) symptoms often reported by those experiencing excess stress include sleep disturbances, muscle tension, headache, gastrointestinal disturbances, and fatigue. Emotional and behavioral symptoms that can accompany excess stress include nervousness, anxiety, changes in eating habits including overeating, loss of enthusiasm or energy, and mood changes. Of course, none of these signs or symptoms means for certain that there is an elevated stress level since all of these symptoms can be caused by other medical and/or psychological conditions.

It is also known that people under stress have a greater tendency to engage in unhealthy behaviors, such as excessive use or abuse of alcohol and drugs, cigarette smoking, and making poor nutritional choices, than their less-stressed counterparts. These unhealthy behaviors can further increase the severity of symptoms related to stress, often leading to a “vicious cycle” of symptoms and unhealthy behaviors.

The experience of stress is highly individualized. What constitutes overwhelming stress for one person may not be perceived as stress by another. Likewise, the symptoms and signs of poorly managed stress will be different for each person.”

“….

How does the response to stress work?

While the complete story is not fully known, scientists understand much about how the response to stress works. The two main systems involved are the hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal (HPA) axis and the SNS. (These systems are described later.) Triggered (activated) primarily by an area in the brain stem (lowest part of brain) called the locus coeruleus, the SNS secretes epinephrine and norepinephrine. The five most important concepts to remember about these two systems are that

    1. Watch for the next instance in which you find yourself becoming annoyed or angry at something trivial or unimportant. Then practice letting go, making a conscious choice not to become angry or upset. Do not allow yourself to waste thought and energy where it isn’t deserved. Effective anger management is a tried-and-true stress reducer.
    1. Breathe slowly and deeply. Before reacting to the next stressful occurrence, take three deep breaths and release them slowly. If you have a few minutes, try out a relaxation technique such as meditation or guided imagery.
    1. Whenever you feel overwhelmed by stress, practice speaking more slowly than usual. You’ll find that you think more clearly and react more reasonably to stressful situations. Stressed people tend to speak fast and breathlessly; by slowing down your speech you’ll also appear less anxious and more in control of any situation.
    1. Jump-start an effective time management strategy. Choose one simple thing you have been putting off (e.g., returning a phone call, making a doctor’s appointment), and do it immediately. Just taking care of one nagging responsibility can be energizing and can improve your attitude.
    1. Get outdoors for a brief break. Our grandparents were right about the healing power of fresh air. Don’t be deterred by foul weather or a full schedule. Even five minutes on a balcony or terrace can be rejuvenating.
    1. Drink plenty of water and eat small, nutritious snacks. Hunger and dehydration, even before you’re aware of them, can provoke aggressiveness and exacerbate feelings of anxiety and stress.
    1. Do a quick posture check. Hold your head and shoulders upright and avoid stooping or slumping. Bad posture can lead to muscle tension, pain, and increased stress. If you’re stuck at a desk most of the day, avoid repetitive strain injuries and sore muscles by making sure your workstation reflects good ergonomic design principles. Take our Workstation Quiz to find out how to make your workstation more ergonomically safe.
    1. Plan something rewarding for the end of your stressful day, even if only a relaxing bath or half an hour with a good book. Put aside work, housekeeping or family concerns for a brief period before bedtime and allow yourself to fully relax. Don’t spend this time planning tomorrow’s schedule or doing chores you didn’t get around to during the day. Remember that you need time to recharge and energize yourself. You’ll be much better prepared to face another stressful day.
  • 1. they are governed by a feedback loop to regulate their response (In a feedback loop, increased amounts of a substance — for example, a hormone — inhibit the release of more of that substance, while decreased amounts of the substance stimulate the release of more of that substance.);

    2. they interact with each other;

    3. they influence other brain systems and functions;

    4. genetic (inherited) variability affects the responses of both systems. (That is, depending on their genes, different people can respond differently to similar stresses.);

    5. prolonged or overwhelming responses of these systems can be harmful to an individual.”

    They have a ton more information on this if you are interested in reading all the articles on this topic click here.

    The issues of stress, surpass any economic range, educational range, race range. It is a condition which has touch all of us from time to time. As a parent I am hyper aware of the stresses in my own life as well as my children’s. Here is a great article on teen stress, click here.

    Stress touches all areas of our lives, the work place, the family and home, school and spiritual.  Physically it is said that every ache and pain in our body is tied into some form of emotional stress.  So you can see how stress would be something one would want to get a handle on and be able to identify. I found an interactive stress indicator on WEBMD.

    To find out how stressed you are right now, use this Interactive Tool: What Is Your Stress Level?

    Panic attacks, difficulty breathing, asthema, heart dis-ease, hypertension, eating disorders and digestive issues, headaches, fatigue, body aches, loss of sex drive, loss of appetite or increased appetite, depression; all of these sound like a bad list of side effects to the latest and greatest drugs on the market, but they are very real symptoms of this invisible destroyer called stress.  Here are some solutions the experts feel are useful tools to reduce stress. I would add a couple of more to theirs at the end.

    Eight Immediate Stress-Busters

    Medical Author: Melissa Conrad Stoppler, MD
    Medical Editor: Jay W. Marks, MD

    Most of our lives are filled with family, work, and community obligations, and at some point we feel as though we are “running on empty.” Here are eight immediate stress busters to help “fill up the tank!” So take deep relaxing breath and read on.

Helpguide.org suggests the following on the subject of work place stress:

Coping with work stress in today’s uncertain climate

For workers everywhere, the troubled economy may feel like an emotional roller coaster. “Layoffs” and “budget cuts” have become bywords in the workplace, and the result is increased fear, uncertainty, and higher levels of stress. Since job and workplace stress grow in times of economic crisis, it’s important to learn new and better ways of coping with the pressure. The ability to manage stress in the workplace can make the difference between success or failure on the job. Your emotions are contagious, and stress has an impact on the quality of your interactions with others. The better you are at managing your own stress, the more you’ll positively affect those around you and the less other people’s stress will negatively affect you.

You can learn how to manage job stress

There are a variety of steps you can take to reduce both your overall stress levels and the stress you find on the job and in the workplace. These include:

  • Taking responsibility for improving your physical and emotional well-being.
  • Avoiding pitfalls by identifying knee jerk habits and negative attitudes that add to the stress you experience at work.
  • Learning better communication skills to ease and improve your relationships with management and coworkers.

Read the article from them here.

They go onto suggest :

Time management tips for reducing job stress

  • Create a balanced schedule. Analyze your schedule, responsibilities, and daily tasks. All work and no play is a recipe for burnout. Try to find a balance between work and family life, social activities and solitary pursuits, daily responsibilities and downtime.
  • Don’t over-commit yourself. Avoid scheduling things back-to-back or trying to fit too much into one day. All too often, we underestimate how long things will take. If you’ve got too much on your plate, distinguish between the “shoulds” and the “musts.” Drop tasks that aren’t truly necessary to the bottom of the list or eliminate them entirely.
  • Try to leave earlier in the morning. Even 10-15 minutes can make the difference between frantically rushing to your desk and having time to ease into your day. Don’t add to your stress levels by running late.
  • Plan regular breaks. Make sure to take short breaks throughout the day to sit back and clear your mind. Also try to get away from your desk for lunch. Stepping away from work to briefly relax and recharge will help you be more, not less, productive.

Task management tips for reducing job stress

  • Prioritize tasks. Make a list of tasks you have to do, and tackle them in order of importance. Do the high-priority items first. If you have something particularly unpleasant to do, get it over with early. The rest of your day will be more pleasant as a result.
  • Break projects into small steps. If a large project seems overwhelming, make a step-by-step plan. Focus on one manageable step at a time, rather than taking on everything at once.
  • Delegate responsibility. You don’t have to do it all yourself, whether at home, school, or on the job. If other people can take care of the task, why not let them? Let go of the desire to control or oversee every little step. You’ll be letting go of unnecessary stress in the process.

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My feelings are this, DO YOU! Massages and spa treatments, shopping for something new, exercise, music and dancing and singing, eat right the foods you eat can contribute to mood swings. Get enough sleep, take a short cat nap if you are able to, three days without sleep can cause psychotic episodes in some people. Sleep deprivation is one of the signs of too much stress. Good sex also generates endorphines which helps to balance out the stress levels in both men and women. Medical Marijuana can also reduce stress more effectively then alcohol. Meditation, getting back to nature, listening to nature sounds, aromatherapy is also a nice way to relieve stress, lavender and chamomile are natural stress reducers, kava kava and st. john’s wort is also a good combo for short term stress relievers naturally, take vitamins, especially E and D for the ladies out there and your B complexs, for hormonal relief, get a check up before you try any of these remedies checking thyroid and other metabolic functions and as with anything check with your physician on what will work for you. I also encourage you to study this topic more and do some google searches on the topic. This is something that is personal and can definitely be reduced this stress stuff.  Coloring is a great stress reducer as well as reading, cooking, gardening, knitting and talking to someone about things that are bothering you. Journaling is another great technique. Whatever it takes to make your stress levels come down. The evidence out there shows that it’s a killer, a silent killer of our many bodies, emotional, physical and spiritual. Take care of yourself and DO YOU!  You are no good to anyone if you are not in good health. I am not a doctor and this is NOT medical advice. There are professionals out there for that. Accupuncture/ Accupressure, Natralopathy, Doctor’s of Osteopathy all are good alternatives to seek when looking for healthy and natural ways to reduce stress.

Loving yourself. Just a few more ways we can do that! I do hope you enjoyed the information. Below are a few calming meditation tapes.

Enjoy the moment of now, yesterday and tomorrow are of no consequence, the real changes happen right now, this very moment in your mind. How do you choose to feel? Do you have control over any of it?? Are you just worrying about you, your life and what you are doing? Do not let other people’s stresses become your own. Check with a doctor to make sure there is nothing medically wrong. Seek out many sources and perspectives with any of the topics I offer in these blogs. Be proactive in your own health and well being!

Peace , Love and Light! Until next time~ Kimberly

A lovely stress relieving video by Ken Davis

Peaceful Blue by Dorothea

Stress Relief 101 video from YouTube

Joe DePalma’s This Too Shall Pass

Brainwave stress reduction video

Stress Relief Tips & Exercises

**picture of hawaiian scene provided by Miss Rae Jensan on Facebook Thanks Rae!

Peace, be safe! xox Kimberly

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