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Greetings and Salutations One and All! Tonight we are proud to present the one and only amazingly wonderful Oberon Zell Ravenheart! This man is truly a joy and you will only be blessed to listen to our show tonight at 9pm MST on blogtalkradio.com/illuminationsoflight. This blog entry will tell you alot more about this truly gifted and inspiring individual and what he’s done and who is he is. We hope that you will join us tonight!

Oberon Zell-Ravenheart is a true modern-day Wizard, and a leading Elder in the worldwide magickal community. Oberon is a modern “Renaissance Man:” a shaman, psychologist, metaphysician, naturalist, theologian, artist, sculptor, teacher, author, animal handler, explorer, showman. He also serves as an ordained Priest of Gaea (Mother Earth).

As a child, Oberon had a natural affinity for the creatures of Nature and spent much of his time alone in the woods. His early attunement to Nature helped to sharpen his natural psychic abilities, and he has worked with many animals—both wild and domestic—over the years. He was an introspective child who loved to read—particularly natural history, mythology, science fiction and fantasy. He went on to earn college degrees in sociology, anthropology, psychology, education and theology. He has worked as a Headstart counselor, school teacher, social psychologist, school counselor, college professor, artist, journalist, author and publisher.

Inspired by Robert A. Heinlein’s 1961 visionary science-fiction novel, Stranger in a Strange Land, Oberon co-founded the Church of All Worlds on April 7, 1962, incorporating it legally on March 4, 1968. He currently serves as Priest, Primate and President. Oberon is also a Priest in the Fellowship of Isis, and an initiate in several different Traditions of Witchcraft and Paganism. He has created and participated in many interfaith projects, including the Council of Themis, the Council of Earth Religions, the Covenant of the Goddess, the Universal Federation of Pagans, Bay Area Pagan Assemblies, the Dictionary Project, the Papal Apology Project, the Pagan Summit, the Grey Council, and the Sonoma County Pagan Network.

Oberon’s work has played a major role in the unity of the magickal community and in reclaiming the spiritual heritage of pre-Christian Europe. In his award-winning magazine, Green Egg (founded in 1968 and now online), Oberon was the first to adopt the words “Pagan” and “Neo-Pagan” to describe the newly emerging Nature religions of the 1960s. In 1970, he developed and published the thealogy of “deep ecology” which has become known as “The Gaea Thesis”—the premise that all life on Earth comprises a single vast living Being, known as “Mother Earth,” or “Gaea” to the ancient Greeks.

Oberon met and fell in love with his soulmate, Morning Glory, at the Gnostic Aquarian Festival in 1973, where he was a keynote speaker. They were married April 14, 1974, in a spectacular public Pagan ceremony. From 1977 to 1985 Oberon and Morning Glory lived in a 5,600-acre intentional community in the mountains of northern Califia, creating a rural homestead and magickal retreat center under the aegis of the Holy Order of Mother Earth (HOME). In February of 1979, they created and led a ritual with a number of Pagan leaders to celebrate the solar eclipse at a full-scale restoration of Stonehenge in Washington State, a transformative event attended by over 3,000 people.

Oberon and Morning Glory founded the Ecosophical Research Association (ERA) in 1977, and their research into arcane lore and legends resulted in the “Living Unicorn” project, begun in 1980 and culminating with the leasing of several of their authentic living Unicorns to the Ringling Bros./Barnum & Bailey Circus. Oberon and Morning Glory also traveled around the United States and Canada exhibiting their Unicorns at Renaissance Faires. Continuing to delve into fables and mysteries, in 1985, Oberon organized an ERA video diving expedition to Australia and New Guinea to solve the ages-old mystery of the Mermaid. These stories and more are told in full in his encyclopedic A Wizard’s Bestiary, with Ash “LeopardDancer” DeKirk (New Page, 2007)

In 1987 Oberon led a pilgrimage and research tour of ancient oracles and archaeological sites throughout Europe and the Mediterranean. Other legendary journeys have taken Oberon to Peru, Hawaii, Alaska, Costa Rico, and back to Australia. In 1999, he visited England for the final total solar eclipse of the Millennium, which he celebrated with local Pagans at an ancient stone circle in Cornwall.

Oberon is the author of many published articles on history, Gaian thealogy, magick, shamanism, mythology, anomalies, archaeology, cosmology, and related topics. He has been interviewed and quoted extensively in many newspapers, magazines, and books on New Age religious movements, magick and the occult. His best-selling first book, Grimoire for the Apprentice Wizard (New Page, 2004) is an essential basic reference work that will continue to serve as a resource throughout the reader’s lifetime.

In 2004, Oberon created the online Grey School of Wizardry, of which he is Headmaster. Incorporated as a 501(c)(3) educational institution, the Grey School is non-sectarian, welcoming teachers and students of all faiths (and none at all). Accepting students of all ages over 11 (with some into their 70s), the Grey School offers a complete Apprenticeship program, in 16 Departments of magickal practice, at 7 levels, culminating in a Certificate of Journeyman Wizard. Around 340 classes are currently available, taught by a faculty of 30 highly-qualified teachers. Social aspects include student Houses and Lodges, Forums, clubs, merits, awards, challenges and other activities, a campus tavern, a student-run quarterly magazine, and summer camp Conclaves held in various locations. The School’s motto is: “Everything is alive; everything is interconnected.”

With many years of theatrical experience, Oberon is a popular workshop presenter and an accomplished ritualist, creating and conducting rites of passage, seasonal celebrations, Mystery initiations (such as the Eleusinia and the Nashville Panathenaia), Earth-healings, and other rituals, both large and small. With Morning Glory, he wrote Creating Circles & Ceremonies: Rituals for All Seasons & Reasons (New Page, 2006)

Oberon’s artwork has illustrated various magazines and books since the late 1960’s. His favorite art project, however, is his ongoing sculpture series of Gods, Goddesses, and mythological creatures, presented as “The Mythic Images Collection.” His masterwork is “The Millennial Gaia”—a visionary representation of Mother Earth.

Oberon and Morning Glory now reside in Sonoma County, California, where Oberon currently serves on the Board of Directors of the Sonoma County Pagan Network.

Books by Oberon Zell:

Grimoire for the Apprentice Wizard (New Page, 2004)

Companion for the Apprentice Wizard (New Page, 2006)

Creating Circles & Ceremonies: Rituals for All Seasons & Reasons, with Morning Glory Zell (New Page, 2006)

A Wizard’s Bestiary, with Ash “LeopardDancer” DeKirk (New Page, 2007)

Green Egg Omelette: An Anthology of Art & Articles from the Legendary Pagan Journal (New Page, 2008)

The Witch and the Wizard OZ, with Morning Glory and John Sulak (Llewellyn, 2010)

Websites:

Oberon Zell: www.OberonZell.com

Grey School of Wizardry: www.GreySchool.com

Church of All Worlds: www.CAW.com

Green Egg magazine: www.GreenEggZine.com

Mythic Images: www.MythicImages.com

Contact info:

Oberon Zell

PO Box 758

Cotati, CA 94931

Oberon@mcn.org

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Here are some YouTube Interviews with Oberon……

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You can now see why we are sooooooooo excited to have this man joining us tonight! Hope you can be there too!

In love and light, make it a wonderous week!

In Oneness of Heart,

Kimberly

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Of course I All my life I was one of those people that zigged when I should have zagged. I was that one person that actually took that,”Wrong turn at Albuquerque
!”There were many times I almost felt like this could be a fact
that if a minute piece of meteor perhaps the size of the head of a thumbtack and at that precise moment everybody was standing ass to ass that particular piece of meteor would find me! Just me!!!
No one else.  I know it sounds like I was running my own home movie of “ Lianna’s  Pity Party“. Really It wasn’t my intention( and those of you out there …..and you know whom you are). When you seem to consistently have the weirdest bad luck no matter how pious or careful,how much time you took to think before you did things they would just seem to explode right in front of you and way  more often than what was acceptable as the norm. It gives you the feeling like you were always navigating thru a heavily mined area and all of the mines were highly movement sensitive and you were in earthquake country! Even the ones that knew me the longest and were close to me (Family) .For example  my mother and my sister would say to me when they would hear about something that happened. First it would be my sister saying to me, “You have the weirdest t hings that seem to happen and a lot of them not good . I’ve watched and you could be standing minding your own business except maybe giving the person that you are next to your ear and listen to their woes while giving them your coat because they were cold and didn’t have one and that would be just about the time that person went inside and locked the door by accident  and can’t hear you knocking not to mention they forgot to give back the coat and that’s about the time a blizzard would strike!” She would then say with my mother nodding her head and then chiming in , “You always do that to yourself you always think with your heart first and your head coming in last and then something happens and it’s you that is the loser…. (they would both pause stare straight into my eyes) then in unison like synchronized swimming “If you would just do it like you are supposed to and use your head first then if necessary your heart….especially those kind of people  you know most of them are just taking advantage of your kindness, they know  your weakness that you think with your heart, why would they come for your help ? They must be not people you could trust because if they could be they would have better people like family or closer friends unless they are doing or have done something wrong and even their family etc. won’t  help them .!” Or the one my brother would say , “Why do you have be so nice and helping those kind of people you know the ones that have PROBLEMS! One of these days you are going to think with that heart of yours and something is going to happen to you bad like hospital or jail or something and I don’t want to be the one to have to tell mom and dad that something happened to you . If you would use your head do something for some charity then you know that the ones you are helping are okay to help, and if you do it that way then you don’t take a < /FONT>risk by being around them.  That’s the smart way! That’s using your head!! “. I know they sound like a bunch of heartless wonders but they really aren’t. They just didn’t know what to say or do for me because really their actions in life did not reflect that shallowness they couldn’t give me any answers and they couldn’t reconcile blaming me for some evil I had done was the reason for my “bad luck”.  I was like the guy on the Flintstone’s “Bad luck Schlep rock” I had some sort of black cloud hanging over just me and the reason was my heart!!  I can see why they saw that as a weakness or maybe it should be categorized as a disability or a birth defect. I admit they did have somewhat of a point in a way. I am guilty of taking people that had “problems or issues” I am guilty as sin of that! I even used to joke and say that my house was the “last way station for kids, animals and down on the luck adults , strays of all kinds. Yes, I was a sap for a hard luck story. Guilty as charged ! A soft touch? Yes guilty! I  Weak? No not because I was a sap for a hard luck story a soft touch or that I always seem to go for the underdog the only weakness I was guilty of was being weak and believing that their was something wrong with thinking with my heart first.  But I also want t o make something clear before I go on I cannot tell a lie some of those “bad luck ” things  that happened were because  it just the way things turned out no blame and others it was my poor decision for one reason or another. Ratio wise though, screw up were 25% as opposed to heart which was about 70%. Although the peanut gallery always blamed it all on me thinking with my heart first!  Due to the constant prodding from family etc. I tried very hard to change my decision making process. I would get close but no cigar! I would have it all set in my head what I was going to do the next time I heard that hard luck story, or the next time someone was down on there luck etc. etc. and then it would happen and everything that I had so carefully prepped myself for would just disappear and suddenly it was like I would go on some weird backward  autopilot. My mind would get in the fetal position with its thumb in it’s mouth and my heart wearing its Superman cape   with my own  personal  singers singing “here I am to save the day!!!”  I would go in with guns a blazing ,  almost like a like the bull in a china shop !!!! Wouldn’t you know it  there I was again asking, “I’m sorry that you are having such a hard time. Have you eaten? Do you  have a place to stay tonight?”.  As my friend Kimberly would say in a New Jersey accent, ” Can we talk?” I always thought or justified (depending on your point of view) What if that were me? or my daughter? and we were down on our luck, I would hope that someone would help me or my daughter out in that type of situation. I figured I was at least putting that energy out into the universe and with that what goes around comes around karma thing going on I may not get the perspective help back from those that I helped but that if I did get into a jam e tc. that the universe would find another “me” type of person and they would be there helping out. Of course the one or two times I used that thought or theory as a defense against my own personal “peanut gallery” I got shot down . Surprisingly on that one ,much to old peanut gallery’s chagrin I was correct.
So on life went, I still was diligently attempting to change ., There were a few  times I was successful in using my mind first but they all turned out as disasters. Just about the time I could feel myself start to go there and buy into some of my own stinking thinking , ” perhaps God or something just didn’t like me or I was being punished for some forgotten offense to the universe”. Then for no apparent reason I experienced one of those life altering, show stopping synchronistic miraculous wave kinda thing that contained uncountable small epiphanies which led to, and culminated with ,a giant monster epiphany!!!! There were also minor realizations in the double digits after ,for example , I realized that I had been carrying parts of the monster epiphany for years actually as far back as I remember! O ne of the biggest realizations  or visions(they are like aftershocks from an earthquake)  was that having those epiphanies , especially the monster,  I felt like I was handed and it  to be carried around in your pocket or purse big  A very large very intricate and quite detailed dot to dot puzzles that you could not guess what the picture was because they were so intricate and detailed and the dots contained were in the triple digits , until all the dots were located and connected in their proper order.
When I finally had “come down” and the “wave” was in a lull before the next possible wave could hit ,my mind began the process of doing that replay thing that it is so good at, going over all those times when I zigged when I should have zagged or when I took those wrong turns at Albuquerque, or I had experienced a “This is another fine mess you gotten yourself into Ollie” kind of thing. I started to see so many things in so many ways 180 degrees different than I did just 10 minutes prior. I realized  that actually the times that I was able to lead with my mind hardly ever turned out copasetic and if I really looked at things, my choices that I used my old heart, minus  the decisions that I knew were poor ones , the odds compared with the average person were better. The only real difference was that when the hear t decides, and it goes wrong for one reason or another, the places that it effects or is pervasive in your life ,have to do more so with your feelings than concrete things not that they might not affect the concrete items but that the prominent issue is your feelings.They also have a tendency towards emotional  dramas like mini soap operas.  The decisions that you make with the heart when they fail or just go
wrong they are noticed more profoundly . I believe that is
because the emotional drama makes them ,what I like to call “Louder”” mistakes. People in general remember those loud errors in judgement or discernment more so because it hits that soap opera gossip gene that is seemingly hard wired in a lot of people.
The part of the monster epiphany that struck me was one that I think is a truth that has been buried within us since  Adam and Eve . This is the part that I believe goes something like this, Somewhere we were the culprits for one  reason or another ( that is one I will perhaps save for  another blog!) that we put this separation between the Mother/Father God  maybe because like teenagers due when they are attempting to figure who they are do the opposite from what they have been taught and shown by their parental figures. You know the pendulum swings all the way to opposite before it is able to get to that middle the place of balance.
As I pondered that part of the puzzle another aspect jumped out and hit me square in the face. The separation that we chose to put between us and God we took it so that the pendulum swung far to that other side and jumped out of our hearts and into our brains or minds. This way we could not look at what it was that was happening and find and excuse for our behavior if it all went wrong, such as I was tempted by a snake, or she made me do it, or it has not scientific or logical proof etc. I also came to understand that in the mind is where the fear, envy, torment, cruelty, despair and  death were born and resided. That within our hearts things like Love , compassion, understanding forgiveness etc lived. Love is what The Source’s essence is made of which our true essence is, it is the essence of creation. If we make decisions from the mind of our heart, that even if it goes awry initially that truly in the bigger picture it was not a poor decision it was that what we were to receive was something that would expand us and that it was something important for us or someone else to learn and experience. It may have gone wrong on a physical 3 D  level or in societies opinion , but in the grand scheme of things what happened was for the highest good .  I also realized that I had actually been lucky, not disabled etc. in any way. I had been doing the process the way it was intended somewhere along the way I was one of those outside of the norm or the box kind of people, that it had been forgotten to let me in on what the human race had changed the programming to. I was born in default mode the optimum mode. At that moment I felt such peace and gratitude that it was indescribable. I knew that when I had time enough to process all of what this Monster “dot to dot” implied that letting others in on the gift of this knowledge was part of what it was about. That I was going to do that “I’ll tell two people and they will tell two people and so on” thing and along with the others that have been given this gift who would also be messengers, the understanding would would be owned by enough of us to cause “a hundredth monkey effect” and perhaps it would be or at least a big contributing factor to our survival when the time came and the transition , the “evolutionary leap” the ascension occurs. I am not sure what to label it but the “big Change” “the shift” that everybody is discussing that has been predicted, that is at the beginning of the final countdown.
Since that initial moment of realization the complete picture of what I was gifted an understanding is exponentially huge and to write about it would take months , so the complete picture I will have to dole it out in increments. How that should be done, I don’t really know.  So  I am having faith that Spirit, God will let me know (He/She has not failed me yet) .  What the crux of the message is that it is time that we turn around step back into our hearts and merge with our higher self our God self that exists in the now only and return and be who we really are and step out of this hell hole soap opera drama illusion that we created for ourselves and let the pendulum finally get back to the middle , the balance point so we can find “home”: again. I’m not sure what all it is I am to embark on from this  illusion we call reality’s fixed point in time at this pivotal moment  in the human race. I do know this , when Source lifted the gate and let me see myself who I really am and whom we all are  (we are but reflections or mirrors of each other which we are also mirrors of The Creator ,the Source, God. which ever you prefer,  made in the image and likeness His/Her children)..Who they have diligently prepared. Who they so carefully watched over. Who they were extremely patient, understanding , forgiving with Who they always without fail proved that their love for me was unconditional, limitless and timeless (forever) I saw the perfection of us and all of creation and that we all  need to see understand and own the perfection of who we are. In that I understood for myself that really it has always been my deep down soul desire , that I was seeing with extreme clarity, To express my gratitude for the gift of life, Glorify my Creator, express from the heart , the “mind” of the heart my perfect unique self and do so with complete faith in that I am the child o f God and that if whatever my choices in life are that it is imperative ( no lame excuses allowed) that it is the heart that is the key.  If we do that merge and step back into the heart that what we do will always be for our highest good and the highest good of all. That if you look into to your core you will know that this is a real truth, undisputable truth. That if we as a human race pull our heads out of our own buttocks , stop being in the dark, be willing to own the truth of it all wake up and smell the coffee, end the illusion the nightmare that we created , loose the soap operas,for lack of a better word,  ‘the ego”, get out of our own way , it will be as easy and simple as opening an unlocked door and stepping over the threshold . to give us back ourselves and be and know and own that we are perfect beings and that children of God is not a metaphor it is literal.
Now that I have shared this story and the message from spirit , I would ask you for one more indulgence that really you have nothing to loose except a few extra moments of your time. The favor I ask is that you ponder, ruminate on what you just read with an open mind and heart. If you should accept the basic premise as “a real genuine all encompassing  truth”: that you pass this gift of an understanding (in a way like the movie “pay it forward”) If you should not be ready to be woken up to own the understanding of this genuine truth , that you keep puzzle in your memory banks and perhaps at a later date try and ponder it again. You really have nothing to loose but everything to gain  God Bless you, Love an light to you all.~Lianna

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Greetings and Salutations! One and All! Well I will tell you this has been a very dynamic week for me personally with all the energies going wild and bouncing off of everyone and everything! Some awesome new stuff was born out of this chaotic energy but it was very difficult to ride this wave!

One of the things I have been learning to do is to be aware. We touched on this in the last entry on mindfullness and we gave you an exercise to play with over the week. How did that go for you? Did you start to notice any changes within your being?

Dr. Bruce Lipton, talks in his book, ” The Biology of Belief”, about how our ” Perceptions” can absolutely have a profound effect on our physical and emotional well being. How we “see” our world through our filters of experiences can be skewed and absolutely create real physical issues. It’s been said, there is your truth, my truth and THE truth. The fact of the matter is, all of us have these experiential filters that cause us to have the experience of something loving or something fearful. If we are in a state of fear, our physical bodies go into a protection mode and we stop growing, we lower the immune system, and deplete from other systems in the body that we use for growth, because on a very primal level we are telling the body to prepare for fight or flight. When our bodies do this, extra blood etc. is sent to the muscles to get ready to run or fight. When we come from a place of bliss or peace or love, our bodies are relaxed and in the mode of growth. The very interesting thing which I found amazing in the ” Biology of Perception” was the tidbit that all of our habits, and beliefs are stored in the “subconscious” not the “conscious” mind. That these two are like two different people. The “subconscious” is very logically based and likes order and is “timeless” it does not know past or future, only current input in the NOW moment, it does not understand otherwise. The “conscious” mind is the part of us that says, “Hey let’s go check that out and get some new experience!” It is the free flowing creative side that doesn’t mind chaos, and getting stuck in the past or the future creates issues if we address issues from this perspective. This is the problem with self help books. They address the conscious mind not the subconscious. You have to address both to gain true healing and balance.

So what are some ways that we begin to reprogram the subconscious mind to be in harmony with our conscious mind? Well there are many tools out there which can be used to achieve this goal. As with all things intent and commitment are key. You have to have a willingness to achieve this. Now at times the subconscious is not ready to accept that change.

How can you tell if the subconscious is ready or not? The human body is equipt with its own bio feed back equiptment! It’s fantastic! Kinesiology is a wonderful tool to help assess and diagnose an issue that may be blocking healing. This same idea can be used to correct thinking and perception.

With regard to mindfullness, where are you feeling it in your body. Last week we had you note 20 things in a room when you found yourself triggered. This week I want you to be aware of where you are feeling your feelings in your own body. What physical signals are you getting from your own body (natural bio feed back) about how you are feeling.

If you wish, take this a step further, and write it down, so you can see in writing, what time of day, what are the triggers, what is the core emotion that is associated with that, it can be simple like feels good or feels bad. By creating this record you begin to see the patterns of your own responses and how your body is affected. By doing this you can begin to reprogram the thinking patterns which were learned at a young age.

I am going to post some videos which far better explain this process of kinesiology and the ways you can use this modality to shift yourself and your perceptions.

Dee Wallace shared a wonderful exercise she did with her seminars, that she would give everyone a PlayDough ball and tell them to create something. Everyone would. Then she would instruct them to mush it up into a ball and create something else.  Her analogy being, we as humans complicate things, that changing our life and our reality is as easy as mushing up that playdough and starting another creation. Instead, we like to hold that creation, drag it around with us everywhere showing it off to everyone etc not doing anything to change that thinking.

So practice being aware of what you are feeling, and where you are feeling it in your own body. Use your own natural biofeedback to help you identify what the challenge areas are within your own being.

Watch these videos on some tools to use to begin to make real changes in your life, in your “perceptions” and beliefs! Let us know what you think!

Until next time! Blessings from me and mine to you and yours in the heart of Oneness. Namaste~!

This first set of videos are from Bruce Lipton, he explains the biological reasons that positive thinking works and how.

I will only post the first one, there are seven in the series! Watch the entire set!

This second set is part II of the lecture featuring Rob Williams, the creator of PSYCH-K, who gives wonderful tools to remove old programming and replace it with new improved ideas that are more in alignment with where you want to be!

This is the “Psychology of Change” by Rob Williams this is part 1 of 8 and you will want to see all 8!

This is a different take on his method

This is a short one on self testing

This again another version of self testing from the folks at enjoyabetterworld.com

This is Dee Wallace on Creative Consciousness, interview on Braveheart Women

This is part 1 of 3, this book is dynamite! You will want to see all of this interview!

Finally Gary Zukav and Linda Francis talk briefly about Authentic Power!

I do hope you find these videos helpful, I know I certainly have.

Blessings all until we meet again!


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Regrets, Questions, and Finding a Way Forward
By Nick Esten-E5 USNavy
I had one of those reflective days where I generally kept to myself and let my mind wander to places that I’ve struggled to forget. It’s pretty easy for me to get lost in my thoughts, because at any given time, my brain remembers, forgets, learns and processes all the little electric signals that produce these words on the screen…

I hear a lot of people claim they have no regrets and sometimes I know they’re lying or they haven’t reached that point yet, but everyone at some point will do or say something that will absolutely and irrevocably shift the course of the rest of their life.

“I wouldn’t be the person I am today if not for “insert excuse here””

Most people say this because it’s the accepted answer to the age old question “What do you regret?”

I think that answer’s a lie, because deep down, most people don’t really like themselves. They hide from themselves; they make excuses for themselves as to why this and why that, and they don’t really know what they are saying. They only know what is acceptable to say.

I know these people exist because I am one of those people. I could sit here and say that in my short 24 years in existence I haven’t done one thing that I regret, but everyone would know it to be flat out bulls**t. I’ve done unfair things to good people, and it cost me everything…the girl I loved, the future I had dreamed of…everything that makes a life colorful was taken because I chose poorly.

And I regret that it took me losing everything to learn one simple lesson; that another person had to suffer because I, for some reason, didn’t have the good sense or courage to stand up for what was right and what I believed in.

You know what I learned?

Integrity is everything. It’s the foundation on which my character is built, not some garment that I can take on and off at will. You give up your integrity, you don’t have anything after that, because everything you are is a pile of s**t.

A life is nothing more than a series of small events, strung together by the fabric of time and the happiest souls are not the ones who have the least worries; they’re the ones who remain flexible. Who, no matter what may come, use a stumbling block as a stepping stone. They’re the ones who move through life like water.

I want that. I had that. Once. I know I can have it again. I’m just lost. I have no real direction, no real goal, I’m just moving through these days without any sort of enthusiasm for much of anything except art. Stories. Poems. Music. Songs. Movies. Photography. These things that move the soul…

I let so many days go. So many days that could’ve been spent better, but I chose to waste them, and now that I can hear his footsteps a little clearer, those days now seem so much more precious. I only have one life, and I want to make it mean something. I want to leave this world a better place than the one I came into. And it’s hard because I see so much of the world going wrong, and I, having so very little control over my own world, don’t know what to do.

I go to work and I come back and I watch the cars go by on the freeway below. Or the ships that sit in port out in the harbor. I wonder why I can’t be more like the wind? To roll freely like I once did.

As you can tell, I spend a lot of time falling back into the past. It’s gone. The very best days of my life are gone and that’s a pretty sad thought…but the beautiful thing about it is that I have no idea what’s yet to come. So my best days may yet be ahead of me. Maybe not, but there is still air in my lungs and if God permits my soul to return each day, then I will find the meaning in my life once again.

In and of itself, life is too big a mystery to figure out in one lifetime. But then again, maybe I’ll get lucky and become one of those happy sages found in some hidden stretch of mountains. Maybe I’ll be old and bald with a bunch of grandchildren and a wife I adore…who knows. I don’t let myself think of such things because deep down, I don’t believe in them. But just because I don’t believe, doesn’t mean it can’t happen…because there are a lot of people who believe in me…and for me.

And I try so desperately not to disappoint.

What more can be said? What would I do for one more day? What would have happened if I had been the one to die that day instead of her? What would she have become? Would she be married? Would she have kids? What would she look like? Her face is just a blur to me now…

I won’t ever be able to answer those questions…survivor’s guilt is something that stays with you all the days of your life. When someone gives their life for yours, what do you do when your life has become such a disappointment?

I wish I knew the answer.

All I know for sure is that somewhere out in the unknown mists of time, there’s an end waiting for me. A lake to which this life of mine flows. And when I get there, I will have a smile on my face because I will know that I was loved, and that I made a difference in someone’s life. That is my motivation. Not to waste a sacrifice. I will find my way through the fog and dark and cold and whatever kind of misery this life can hurl at me. And I will be the light in the dark for people as I have been…for what is to give light, must endure burning.

From this day forward, I live my life for the people who make it worth living. The friends that make me smile, the love that makes me glow, and the series of small events that will make this life of mine a damn good read someday. When I’m gone…I want people to remember one thing and one thing only.

Love.

Because that is what I remember.

“What tomorrow brings, we cannot know”

From the mouths of babes….
This is my son. My first born. It’s nice to know when some of your own teachings begin to shine through. Especially yesterday when this was written, regrets, the things we do that we wish we could change. We are not our story. We can change right now. This moment as you are reading this blog. Life is too short to waste on things that are not real, not tangible, not worthy of our love and energy. If people do not want to drink after they have been given the trough full of water and instructions on how to drink, then there is nothing to be done. Walk away. Pray for them. Live YOUR life to the fullest in truth to yourself most of all. It’s those lies we will not admit to ourselves where our sickness lies. Those are the tapes so deep that you hear them in your sleep. The ones that creep out when you least expect them. The ones that cause us to self sabotage. The ones that make you forget that love is a two way street it takes cooperation on both sides to make it work. The ones that make us feel “less than” or “not enough” or “not worthy” or “bad” because we fail to live up to another’s expectations or our own.

I was faced recently with do I want LOVE or do I want a PARTNER … the man I love, still to this day, is in no way shape or form partner material for me at this time. He is unavailable on several levels, most of all emotional. Too afraid to explore changes outside his comfort levels inside and out. A lion in business, the cowardly lion inside, searching for his courage that was always there if he believed in himself enough to not care what others thought. A true warrior knows that love is his strength not a dark spot in his life. A partner works as a team, thinks as a team, lets nothing stand in the way of the goal of the team and never leaves a man or woman behind. One too can have a partner without love. Is that better? To live a life content but not fulfilling without love in it. Because it’s always been that way, because to go outside the “story” people have of you,  may make them or yourself look bad? Why would you care what the other person thinks really? Who are you trying to impress? Would it occur to that person that perhaps misery loves company? Would it occur to that person that to dictate, “you are the one we all look up to, you are the perfect example of what life should look like” just because you do things OUR WAY or a certain way, is a form of manipulation for control over your thinking and not about duty or respect? If passive aggressive behavior is the price you pay if you do not conform to the “idea” , “the plan”, “the way it should be”, all because you did what made you happy? That we are to surpass our parents thinking so as to evolve as a species? To be real with our kids and prepare them for the real world not some fantasy “Keeping up with the Jones” or sheltering them from the pains that real life bring and being the example of how to get around that and still be true to yourself?? To exist without love is not life. You are not living in my opinion if that is the case. Existence and survival are not living!  I decided that I wanted LOVE AND A PARTNER IN ONE! When I drew that boundry, I was met with anger, rejection, cruelty, everything that was not love. I knew this person had been lying to themselves and when I made that person look at it, they reacted with chaos and coldness and chose to walk away. To walk away from love, for convenience and the comfort of what is known, to be nothing more then a provider and a gopher,  a cog in a dilapidated wheel, which as all things mechanical wear out,  to be a shell of the person they could be, even though that life is toxic to their soul? They see a duty misplaced, loyalty not earned,  a truth…perceived… that is not truth to most people’s perceptions, but to them  it is.(Hitler thought he was RIGHT! Doing what GOD AND EVERYONE EXPECTED HIM TO DO AS THE “MAN” THE “LEADER” Yet, no one else saw it that way….. did that make it right to them or the people who suffered at all costs to keep his “vision” of what was right?  They had love in the palm of their hands, lying in their arms, two hearts beating as one and peace in the closeness, the truth of love, lights appearing with each and every kiss and comfort in their soul…..except when it came time to follow through on promises and dreams created, to put action and commitment to the vision,  to pay the piper, to walk the talk, to pay the debts one creates through words and actions. Then that person became angry, saw things as an attack, as an ultimatum, as fear. Pushing it away. Stomping on it. Belittling it. Not allowing it to exist within their own mind. What we resist will persist. And sometimes it’s too late.  All because they were too weak to say enough is enough. I choose love and happiness. Truth is subjective, if the truth is a perspective. What IS just IS. This person will assuredly regret his choice when they realize, they are totally alone. When the people they trusted to have the answers, when they didn’t want to look for themselves, prove to be wrong for them even though it worked for this person who gave this advice, or the people who they try to keep happy all the time being the golden child in their eyes die or get sick and do not remember those answers and are no longer there to give them that ego affirmation, when the duty and loyalty back fires in their face with betrayal, when the world they so desperately hold onto, fought for, to save it’s existence, the dream of what they wanted so desperately in the beginning when they truly settled for less then what they originally wanted,  exists no more because it was all just illusion, when their greatest fears come to pass and they lose the respect of those who matter most because they refused to take a chance and grow. When they too can gain the insight that my children and I have gained. Love is all there is … to live your life for the sake of how it looks or for someone else’s well being, is a lie to yourself. To lie to yourself is a sad sickness that can be changed at any moment, it’s never too late. Walk your talk and act with love and integrity, accept that life is not perfect and to deal with it the best you can as long as you have love around you. Interesting to think how the brain works…. Love, makes us fill in the blanks. Like when you read a sentence and the brain will put a missing word or correct spelling on a word which is misprinted, so we still understand the sentence even though that is not what it said,  we do the same in our relationships. We fill in the blanks of what’s missing or not quite right. We fix it to make it work for awhile. We create perfection or tolerance for those we “love” by sub consciously filling in the blanks, making excuses, living a lie, or lying to ourselves being in denial about what really is in that moment. Problem is then we get surprised when the whole thing falls apart and doesn’t work. We are not being truthful to ourselves, not seeing those missing words and it didn’t work, didn’t make sense, didn’t line up the right way! Well isn’t that a big surprise! Love always finds its way back to itself. True strength, requires the courage to look beyond the pain and the loss to the power of creation and manifestation. Overcoming those obstacles through love. Through love (Creator) all things are possible, surrendering control and attachments to outcomes. It is sad when love seemingly dies on any level, through your own actions or through circumstance and time. True love never dies, wanes perhaps, changes its depth or style, HOW we love can change but REAL love never dies. It is always my hope to find the gifts within each encounter in myself and to find the good in all those who’s paths I cross. I try to be a positive influence in the world around me always. To make a positive memory instead of a negative one. To not have regrets in my life, only to walk with integrity, to make lemonade when life hands me nothing but lemons, to have as kind a heart as I possibly can, to show my fellow man compassion and understanding and tolerance in the choices they make and try to recognize that I am worth loving, I have something to say, I have something to contribute to this world around me, I am perfect as I am now in all ways, I forgive myself for those things I cannot change, but do my best to learn from those mistakes and grow from them and to not make the same mistakes over and over again. The insanity lies there. I do not want to wallow in the dark caverns of sadness and hopelessness for years and years. As my friend Stanley says, “I would rather have a near life experience” Life includes ebbs and flows, and sometimes those tides can be extreme, but it is how we deal with it, honestly or in sketchy ways, which dictates our character. If you do not like what you see when you look there, then change it. Change yourself, how you look at things. Today, right now in this moment! You can begin by changing the words “can’t” and “trying” in your own vocabulary! Those are excuse words. You can do what you put your mind to if you want it bad enough. Trying is not doing! Put up or shut up as they say! Walk your talk or you are by definition a hypocrite. It only takes one step at a time. Baby steps, one step forward two steps back. We will always slide back to what is comfortable. What we know the outcome will be. It’s way harder to take those steps through the door of the unknown to what could be better or worse from our own perspectives. Release the fear. It could be BETTER! When a door closes a window opens, that which we lose or set free return if they are meant to be…usually better then before. The worst feeling in the world is “What if?” The not knowing because we didn’t try because we were afraid to know the answer when we had the chance to know it for sure. At least when we take a chance and we fail we are living. Truly there is no failure, just what works best for us. We are no one to judge what works and doesn’t for another person. That is a form of control, judgment. Surrender, Release, Forgive, Accept, Love. Live to never regret. Follow your heart, for love is all there is. The rest is a waste of time and a foundation of more regret. Do what you love, be who YOU are, not someones version of you. Find the courage to stand up for what you believe is best for you! Stick by it. Know what you want, and do not act from fear, entrapment, manipulation, depression, hopelessness. Coming from a place of emotion instead of knowing can only bring lower vibrational lessons with them. Some of the most painful kind. Try to see the good in people even those who have done atrocious things to you, you will cut down your suffering and sadness. Turn that frown upside down and laugh. Find something to make yourself laugh. Laughter is the best medicine for a broken or wounded heart. It reminds you that you are still alive. As long as you are, all moments pass to memory and as extreme as they are the next moment could hold the difference. My friend always says to me, “Do not give up five minutes before the miracle!” hold on until the next moment comes. Look to the past and learn from it so you can know the future and what to do with it. See how you want it to change and begin with your own thinking. Be the pebble in the pond and start a ripple of love to change negative vibrations around your environment, this will spill over like the ripples in the pond.
Do not throw pearls before swine. Do not give your love to those who do not return it, cherish it and respect it. For to stay in imbalanced states can only lead to one end, a return to balance by any means necessary. That can be destructive and painful if we resist. I personally prefer to ride the waves not get totally crushed by them. Like waves, they can catch us off guard, have rip tides and under currents which pull us down and we lose our breath for a brief moment, but we swim and pull ourselves up to breath again and see the sunshine on the water and see the beauty of all that is around. The ocean like love can be nurturing or destructive depending on the influences around it. Never mess with Mother Nature! She’s got a mighty sword herself!
Life is good. Love is life. Do not throw it away when you have it. Honor it. Cherish it. For tomorrow it may not be the same.
Blessings everyone! Make it a great day! Love and Light, Kimberly.

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The audio blog for this entry is here!


Greetings and Salutations! One and All! I want to open this blog and say thank you to all that were involved in the premier episode of Illuminations of Light Live, those who were heard but not really seen. Tricia who wrote the music for our exit also helps man the stations on pal and helps me with the graphics so she’s a blessing and a half to me! Then Lianna, she is well amazing! She is involved with almost all aspects of the show with myself. Then the Mtn Hawk, who is my sound / streaming tech on pal talk , Stevan who is my silent hero, the wind beneath my wings, who has been invaluable to me for making the technical magic happen, giving me ever patient training to run that technology and has been a personal support person, teacher, guide and friend,  for me for years with his astrological genius and generous nature. There are several others in my life who are near and dear and you know who you are….to all of you, from my heart, thank you!

The show was a great success! Ronna was brilliant! She is an absolutely beautiful lady who is just so full of love and truth and amazing grace unending. Such a blessing to have had time to speak with her and get to know her a bit better. I for years, used her messages as part of my teachings. She is the teacher of teachers most assuredly. Thank you Ronna for making our show memorable and blessed!

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So today I want to talk about ascension. Now this word like so many other words can mean many things which are not the same, to many people. For me, I see things a bit differently then perhaps most, but it is my truth which I will share at the end of the blog.

According to the dictionary the definition of ascension is thus:

Main Entry: as·cen·sion
Pronunciation: \ə-ˈsen(t)-shən\
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Latin ascension-, ascensio, from ascendere
Date: 14th century

: the act or process of ascending

Main Entry: as·cend·ing
Pronunciation: \ə-ˈsen-diŋ\
Function: adjective
Date: 1581

1 a : rising or increasing to higher levels, values, or degrees <ascending powers of x> b : mounting or sloping upward
2 : rising upward usually from a more or less prostrate base or point of attachment

and according to free online dictionary:

as·cen·sion // (-snshn)

n.

1. The act or process of ascending; ascent.
2. Astronomy The rising of a star above the horizon.
3. Ascension

a. In Christianity, the bodily rising of Jesus into heaven on the 40th day after his Resurrection.
b. A feast celebrating this event, observed on Ascension Day.

Metaphysically the definition of ascension is  the re-joining of the individual consciousness with the consciousness of universal Oneness which translates to a state of Love and total understanding. The Christ Consciousness is a state of Love. So the second coming of Christ is the awakening of the knowledge which was once hidden within our own dna structures, moving our physical bodies to bodies of light again, which was our original form, which is a crystalline based body, not the dense physical forms we currently inhabit which are carbon based.  This particular thing we are calling the ascension has never been done before. Meaning, we remain on the planet and move through the rebirth in physical form along with the other beings of this planet. Previously in the Earth incarnations, all beings were removed and the planet would be cleansed and re seeded. This time we are not doing this quite this way. So this is why sometimes the whole time thing gets off for some folks well one of the reasons why I should say, there are some more technical scientific reasons in addition to this about the time issue.
So from the religious perspective it’s about attaining christ states, which is ultimately the same thing, God says, we are made in His image. OK, let’s go with that for a minute, His image is both male and female so God is androgynous both male and female, He is Light, in the beginning there was light….we were created from the darkness to the light…LIGHTBODIES. Jesus says to the people, ” I am the way and the light” how he learned through the years (missing years of Jesus) how to master things like meditation and the knowledge of the ancients and was able to attain “activating” his light body, and now has the ability to travel all dimensions and time lines to go where he needs to be. Same with Thoth, and Elijah and Melchezedik so we have had the examples in the past, just not in our time frame, although that is open for discussion as I believe many in the 9/11 left in body before planes hit. Point to this is, we gain some insight as to how to attain our lightbody or awakening / activating our Merkabah which acts as our vehicle in harmony with the physical body. In order to achieve this you must have the basic tools down in meditation and understanding that you have to let go of the old programming set into your being by parents, churches, schools etc which were not the Truth, the universal Truth, it was their perceptions which you do not have to own.
My feelings are thus:
If this is truly an illusion as they all say it is, then we never fell, that was a perception. So there is nothing to “ascend” to as we are already there. We are simply re-awakening to that which we already know inherantly within our beings. This is an “enlightenment” period. When we finally get the blindfolds taken off and can see again, renewed, reborn. We have always had the gifts within, we just forgot how to use them. For in the beginning when this planet was created, there was only the law of One, we were in lightbodies back then, we created from the ether of the planet. This was when this solar system still resided within the fifth dimensional levels. We were placed in the third after the wars to save the projects which were here, put them into a suspended state which required that we too have a suspended state of awareness. We agreed to do this way back then, knowing that this time frame we are in now would be coming. Many were accelerated in their understanding, with the help of beings who reside in a different dimensional reality then ourselves. They can now help whereas they were not allowed to interfere before.
So when we discuss ascension in my eyes we are discussing the journey within to merge to our original states of being. When we awaken like in dreams, we have greater clarity, depth of understanding ourselves which would not have been possible without the experience of duality. The basis of quantum mechanics is that there has to be a consciousness to begin the process of the laws of physics. The only way for a conscious anything to KNOW itself is to EXPERIENCE itself. Hence why we exist. We are children of God, we hold a piece of that within our beings every one! See Gregg Braden’s The God Code. We, the essence of us, the Spirit of us, is an extension of that consciousness we call God, we are experiencing ourselves individually but for the consciousness as a whole as well. Our soul, is a library, holding the history of our experiences for our recall as needed. The game of life is played in all roles, good, bad, asleep, awake, we play different roles to gain the experience individually so that we can define ourselves, and refine that definition as we move through the various positions in the game. Think of it like baseball you are still a team but with different positions and as the innings change your role changes too. Simplified I know but a good analogy. So for many who are here now, this is graduation day of this class called the human experience. They are graduating from this school and moving onto other schools to continue their disovery of themselves in differnt areas. That is why many feel they are not coming back here, that they are finished. Many will be back for the next major transition but not before. So it truly is an individual experience for all of us, yet we are still completely connected to all things within this reality, for the energy we call a higher power is Love and Love is the most powerful energy of them all.
This is all for today, I do hope you all have a wonderful weekend. We will continue with this topic as we visit other perspectives and messages regarding this topic soon. Not sure if I will post this weekend, I have been under the weather the past week, so I think I will take time to rest! But before I go…. I want to give you all an energy alert!
The magnetics are insane right now, we are seeing the physiological effects of that as we hear the nutty news headlines about Zebras running free in Atlanta, Ice Cream men being shot for music on truck, teachers walking in and blowing away staff on campus, men crashing planes into buildings after burning house because he was upset with the IRS. Yeah watch the headlines and know that the magnetics are having a major effect on the brains now, we need to make sure to do our meditation daily right now, stay in the centered place and ask for things to come with ease and grace always. Send out love and a new blueprint of how we would like it to be. Joined efforts in thought no matter what time of day, are powerful! So try to not get sucked into the attitudes and lattitudes of the people ” out there” be patient and send them love and compassion for now they need that most. Peace , love and light people of Earth!
xox Kimberly


as·cen·sion // (-snshn)

n.

1. The act or process of ascending; ascent.
2. Astronomy The rising of a star above the horizon.
3. Ascension

a. In Christianity, the bodily rising of Jesus into heaven on the 40th day after his Resurrection.
b. A feast celebrating this event, observed on Ascension Day.

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